


Until Sunrise

by Casei_Solus



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alpha Dean, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Bottom Castiel, First Time, Implied Mpreg, M/M, Mythology References, Omega Castiel, Self-Lubrication, Suicidal Thoughts, Top Dean, Werewolf Castiel, Werewolf Dean, Witch Meg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-31
Updated: 2016-11-02
Packaged: 2018-08-12 04:08:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 25,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7919935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Casei_Solus/pseuds/Casei_Solus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Long ago, when the world was young, before the stars adorned the sky, only the moon lit the night. In the dark, evil creatures crept about, eating and tormenting all they come across. Magic is a dark and terrifying thing, and those who use it are feared and distrusted. In this old, ancient world, Dean is a lone warrior, the last of his pack, trying to survive on his own, when he finds another, mysterious wolf wandering the night. Though he is drawn to protect and care for this wolf, his devotion is tested when demons, curses, magic, prejudice, and nature itself seem determined to tear them apart forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [Bellacatbee](http://archiveofourown.org/users/bellacatbee). Love you, Bella. <3
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> ~The Speckled Wolf~

Long ago, when the world was young, before the stars adorned the sky, only the moon lit the night. The moon: the winged white wolf, the god of wolves and of Omegas, darkness’s bane. However, for one day in its cycle, the moon is new and dead and gone from the sky. This was the Black Moon - when the night was lightless. On this day, it was unwise for travellers to wander in the forest, as the darkness gave rise to many strange and fell creatures who sought to take any unsuspecting traveller as their food or their slave. Or worse.

But yet this traveller, this werewolf, this one was alone, for he had no choice but to be so, even on this most dangerous of nights.

The creature, yellow-gold in his wolf form, padded through the thick forest, following the steady flow of the stream, depending on his keen eyes to guide him in the thick, pitch black darkness. Eventually, the stream opened up to a calm, flat lake. It was early winter, so there was snow on the ground, but the lake remained unfrozen still.

And here, alone in the dark, he heard movement.

The splash of water came from his right, motivating him to change to his human form and don a crudely made furskin jacket, cloak, and pants from the pack he always carried with him. This done, he quickly clasped his bow and arrow, readying it in his hands. Whatever creature lay at the source of that sound, there was little chance of it bearing good will. Not on a Black Moon.

He crept closer, searching the shore as he drew his bearskin cloak tightly around him.

There. A pale figure, unclothed, walking out of the lake he'd been swimming in, shaking his black hair dry.

And he was beautiful.

The wolf had never seen anyone so handsome, or anyone so pale - pale as snow in the mountains, with eyes the color of the sky in summer. Even in such darkness, he could make those eyes out - they seemed to glow in their radiance.

It wasn’t until the smell hit him, though, that he lowered his bow.

The smell of spring flowers, of freshness, of a mountain spring. And fertility.

The figure was an Omega. An Omega wolf.

But that made no sense. An Omega out here alone? He must have been abandoned.

“Hail, Omega! I mean you no harm!” he shouted as he ran towards the figure.

The figure glanced up at him, eyes glimmering, smiling widely before going back to drying himself. He didn’t seem afraid at all.

“Are you well?” the wolf asked, searching for the caretaker Alpha or Beta that must be nearby, but smelling no other.

“Yes, of course,” the figure replied.

“Are you not cold?” he said, unable to help looking at his damp, pale, naked body. He was delicate and fair, without blemish or scar, scent like the smell of heaven.

The wolf couldn’t help but feel himself become aroused at the sight of him.

The figure appeared lost in thought for a moment. “Yes,” he at last responded. “Yes, I am cold.”

“Here,” the wolf replied, forcing himself to look away as he shrugged the cloak off his shoulders to offer the poor Omega.

“Oh!” the figure responded cheerfully. “Thank you,” he said, hugging the cloak around him. The large coat swallowed his small figure, but he seemed delighted by it.

“You shouldn’t be alone. Fell creatures roam the forest during a Black Moon, and even some Alpha wolves will take advantage of a lone Omega such as yourself.”

“But _you_ are an Alpha, and _you_ didn’t.”

The wolf smiled. “What are you doing out here on your own?”

“I could ask the same of you. After all, I hear it is bad luck for a wolf to wander the forest when there is no moon in the sky.”

The wolf smirked wryly. “Bad luck and I are old friends.”

“Yet you remain kind.”

The wolf shrugged. “I doubt that. You however seem quite suspicious.”

“Do I?”

“Yes. A perfectly at-ease Omega alone on a Black Moon? For all I know you’re a skinchanger, a warlock or demon, or some siren formed to delight my fantasies to lure me in and slay me.”

“I delight your fantasies?”

“You evade the question. You, lone Omega, seem too good to be true. How do I know you are not going to drag me to the bottom of the lake once my back is turned?”

The figure appeared lost in thought as he ran his gaze up and down the Alpha wolf’s body. “I very much doubt you are the sort to be led anywhere against his will.”

The wolf smiled. That much was true. “So what, then? You speak cordially to me, yet you yourself are hardly commonplace. So what are you? Good? Evil?”

The figure smiled widely. “I am myself.”

“A vague answer.”

“Oh, then, what may I call you?” the figure said, sitting down in the snow, hugging the cloak close. “Good? Evil?”

The wolf rubbed the back of his neck. “I used to know, but now I’m not so sure. But I suppose you may call me ‘Dean.’”

“Dean,” the figure said, as if tasting it in his mouth. He seemed to like it.

“So are you going to tell me your name? Or yet another riddle?”

The figure giggled. “I am Castiel.”

“Castiel?” Dean said thoughtfully. “I’ve not heard that name before.”

“I am from very far away.”

“I could guess,” he said, looking down at the frail, lean Omega now curled up in his cloak. Look at him, so small, so helpless. In his Alpha heart, he couldn’t leave him like this. He had to care for him. Some part of him just wanted to hold the Omega close and share their body heat, keep him safe and protected in his arms. Despite his strangeness.

“Are…” Dean asked hesitantly, “Are you hungry?”

“Hungry?” Castiel said, tilting his head. “Yes, I believe so.”

Dean pulled the pack from his back and set it in front of him, digging through its contents before finally espying a pouch full of freshly picked berries. “Here,” he said, pouring the berries into his hands and extending them towards the Omega.

“You… You offer me your food?”

“Yes. You said you were hungry.”

A puzzled look crossed the Omega’s expressive face as he looked deep into Dean’s eyes, as if such an act was incomprehensible, foreign. “I thank you, Dean. You are very generous,” he said, gently taking the berries from the Alpha’s large hands.

Dean shrugged as he sat down crosslegged across from the Omega. “Not really.”

Castiel popped one of the berries in his luscious mouth, the taste bringing a smile to the his lips.“You say that, yet you have been nothing but gracious to me, a complete stranger.”

“I… I suppose I merely want to keep you safe.”

“Keep me safe?”

“Yes. Night during a Black Moon is very dangerous. And you… you look so helpless. I don’t want you to get hurt or killed.”

“That is very kind, Dean.”

“It is likely just mindless Alpha instinct. Not really kindness,” Dean said, turning away.

Before he knew what was happening, the Omega had crawled on Dean’s lap, straddling him and nuzzling his cheek.

Dean froze in shock. “I, I don’t-”

“You don’t seem mindless to me, Dean,” Castiel smiled.

Oh, god. The Castiel’s scent was so perfect, so wonderful. He couldn’t help but bury his nose in the Omega’s throat to inhale more of its heavy ambrosia. He always wanted to smell that scent. Forever.

Suddenly, Castiel pulled away, tilting his head as he looked closely at Dean’s now flushed face, his blue eyes shimmering with curiosity. “Your face is speckled.”

“What?” Dean asked, still coming off the high of the scent and the feeling of Omega on his lap. God, Castiel was still astride him, arousing him even more.

“Your face. It’s speckled.”

“Oh,” Dean breathed. “Yes.”

Castiel grinned widely. “I like it.”

“Oh?” Dean said, unable to hold back his blush at the compliment.

_Change the subject, change the subject._

“Do you have any family, people to look out for you?” he asked.

“No, I take care of myself,” Castiel responded before leaning against Dean’s shoulder and sighing happily. “You are very warm. It’s nice.”

_Oh, fuck._

_Calm down. From where he’s from this might be normal. Don’t assume he means anything. You don’t want to hurt him._

_**I** don’t want to hurt him._

“You are truly alone, then?” Dean asked, concerned.

“Yes,” Castiel responded, resting his head happily on Dean’s shoulders. “Are you?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“My, uh,” he said, halting. “My pack and family were… they were killed.”

Castiel leaned back, sadness in his eyes. “That is terrible. I am truly sorry.”

Dean averted his eyes. “Yes, so I am the wolf that no one wants. I don’t blame you if you- if you want to stay away. You are a magnificent Omega. You deserve better company than I. Lone wolves are dangerous.”

“As am I,” Castiel said with a toothy grin. “And I am not frightened of you.”

“You aren’t?” Dean replied, partially amused and partially surprised. Most wolves, upon discovering that he had no pack, would desert him immediately. After all, there must be a reason he was alone.

“Of course not. And I am sure you’ll find a pack to take you in. You are good and gentle, and when you love, you love deeply.”

“Oh, and you can tell this _how_?”

“I’m insightful,” Castiel chirped.

Dean couldn’t help but smile. He didn’t know much at all about this Omega, but he knew that he wanted to learn more of him. And he knew that he was going to keep him safe, no matter what it took.

“Oh, it’s sunrise!” Castiel said, looking to the east as soft pink rays peeked above the horizon. “I must leave,” he said, climbing off of Dean’s lap.

“Leave?” Dean said, dismay in his voice, and feeling suddenly chilled by the loss of his warm companion.

“Of course! All things must end.”

“Please stay. I swear I will hunt for you and protect you.”

“I cannot stay.”

“I will go with you then, to keep you safe.”

“You cannot come with me.”

“Why, Castiel?” Dean said, hurt.

The Omega’s bright blue eyes turned to him, even more vivid in the dawning light. For a moment, there was a hint of sorrow in them. “I am alone. I must always be alone. That is how these things are.”

“They don’t have to be.”

“No, Dean. Some things cannot be changed.”

“Please, Castiel,” Dean begged, standing to his feet.

Castiel turned to look at him for a long while, saying nothing. At last, however, he reached up to kiss Dean’s forehead. “May you be blessed on your path,” he said, taking off the cloak he had been wearing, and offering it back to the wolf.

“Keep it,” Dean said, eyes to the snow-covered ground to grant the frail, naked Omega some privacy.

“Dean-”

“You have no cloak of your own. I want you to stay warm. It would be my honor if you would keep it.”

Castiel fell silent, rendered speechless. He’d never experienced such an act of selflessness before. “…Thank you, Dean,” he at last said. Once more, he clothed himself in the large bearskin cloak, so long on him that it dragged against the snow, before directing his eyes to the telltale rays of the rising sun. Before he could turn away, however, Dean clasped his narrow wrist, drawing the Omega’s gaze to him.

“Will I ever see you again?” Dean said, an ache burning in his chest. Now that he’d met him, he never wanted to leave him. He wanted to always be there, to protect him. To keep him warm. But to lose him forever…?

Castiel was quiet for what felt like a very long time, before, at last, he spoke.

“Yes, Dean,” he said with a whisper. “Yes, you may see me again.”

“When?” Dean asked, eagerly.

“Next Black Moon, come here, and wait for me. Come alone.”

_Black Moon?_

“I vow to the sun and moon, I will be there.”

At last, Castiel once again smiled. “Farewell, Speckled Wolf.”

And at that, he turned and entered the still-dark forest, and was gone.

Dean did not follow him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
>   
> An example of one of the Fell Creatures that wander the dark, the kind of thing you have to watch out for at night, especially during a Black Moon. A Fell Beast is a manifestation of darkness, demons can take on their true form sometimes as Fell Beasts, as their humanoid form can be somewhat limiting.
> 
> This one here is dripping out giant black globules because yay. It also prefers to eat its prey’s guts while they’re still alive, because it’s warmer that way. <3 
> 
>  

The fire glowed warm.

Dean had kindled it that afternoon as the last step of preparation before night fell. Before that, he had killed and skinned a stag, whose flesh was even now cooking above the flame’s wild licks. About the perimeter of the fire was a wide, crude circle of upturned dirt. A week or so earlier, Dean had purchased a bag of enchanted dust that would protect him from fell creatures. Due to the slight wind, however, he had to dig a sort of moat and pour the dust inside it, burying it beneath the dirt and snow. After all, the fire was sure to attract unwanted beasts, but he had now defended it. Defended the Omega. Like an Alpha should.

Dean hugged his new cloak close about him - a Black Moon in the depth of winter was bitterly cold, but, if he could see Castiel tonight, it would be worth it.

But he hadn’t yet. The sun had fully set an hour or so ago, leaving him alone in the dark, windy, snowy night.

Had Castiel forgotten? Had whoever was holding him back not allowed him to come?

Did Castiel not want to see him anymore?

The very prospect made his heart ache.

 _Please, Castiel. Please._ He prayed silently.

“Dean?” a voice called out.

“Castiel?” Dean shouted, standing to his feet and running to the shore. The voice hadn’t come from far away. “Castiel!”

“Dean?” A voice spoke from behind him.

“Castiel!” the Alpha shouted, spinning to see the little wolf not three paces behind him, wrapped in Dean’s old bearskin cloak.

Before he knew what he was doing, Dean embraced and lifted the Omega off his feet, spinning him around, the Alpha’s laughter sounding over the winds around them. At last, though, he set the Omega down, but still held him close.

Castiel froze for a moment in shock, before warming up at the feeling of Dean gently nuzzling into his shoulder. “I must say I’m surprised to find you here. I was sure you’d forget, or not bother.”

“How could I forget you?” Dean said, smiling widely as he breathed in the Omega’s scent. He’d almost forgotten how amazing it was.

“But I was late.” _You were supposed to give up after I was late._

Dean shook his head. “Doesn’t matter. You’re here now,” he said, finally letting Castiel go to get a good look at him. God, he was so beautiful.

The Alpha furrowed his brow. “Are you wearing just that cloak?” he asked, concerned.

“Oh. Yes,” Castiel said.

“Have you no other clothes?” Dean said, distressed at the very idea.

“No,” Castiel responded. “I mostly stay a wolf.”

“But you’ll freeze to death,” Dean said, immediately grasping Castiel’s slender wrist. “I need to get you near the fire, now.”

“Oh!” Castiel yelped in surprise, overwhelmed at the care he was being shown.

“I’m sorry I didn’t build the fire closer to the lake shore, I didn’t think it would be safe so out in the open,” he said, leading him to the small clearing still glowing with the fire’s warmth and the sweet smell of cooking meat.

“You did all this?” Castiel said, looking at the perfectly-made fire pit and the several furs strewn about to sit on.

“Yes!” Dean said, proudly, before pulling Castiel up to the fire and bidding him take a seat. Castiel complied, stunned at everything around him.

“The dust didn’t stop you!” Dean grinned.

“The dust?”

“I made a circle of dust to keep us safe from fell creatures. You must not be one!”

Castiel smiled. “No, I am not.”

“I had to be sure,” Dean said, reaching for the meat skewered by the spit. It felt nice and hot. He immediately offered the food to Castiel.

“For me?” Castiel said.

“Yes. Please eat,” Dean said, beaming, heart soaring, chest aching with joy. Castiel was here. With him.

“What about you?”

“I ate earlier.”

“Oh. Alright,” Castiel said, gingerly reaching for the spit, examining the meat curiously before taking a bite. His face lit up. “It’s good!”

Dean chuckled. “Did you expect it to be bad?”

Castiel giggled as he devoured the meat hungrily. Dean couldn’t help but watch him; his every movement was so graceful, so beautiful.

The Omega didn’t seem to mind his staring, and kept eating happily, until the spit was clean. He hummed contentedly. “I must say I’m not… used to such treatment.”

“You aren’t?” Dean said, upset at the thought.

Castiel chuckled. “That’s not what I meant - I haven’t been abused, Dean. I suppose I merely didn’t expect anything like this.”

“But you’re worth it, Castiel. You’re the most fascinating person I’ve ever met, and the most beautiful Omega I’ve ever seen. Anyone who doesn’t treat you like something precious is a fool.”

Castiel blushed at the compliment, turning away to hide his burning cheeks. “You flatter me.”

“I do not.”

“So you do all this, then, because I am beautiful?” Castiel said, raising his chin and meeting Dean’s gaze. “That you might woo me, perhaps? What if I were to tell you I had no interest in being a mate?”

Dean furrowed his brow, some part of him hurt. At the accusation? At the prospect? He wasn’t sure.

“I still would want you to bed fed and warm,” he said, thinking hard. “Besides, I don’t think I have a chance with you, anyway. You’ve spent so little time with me, and likely much more with others more like yourself.”

“So you did all this… why?” Castiel asked pointedly. After all, people never did things for him without expecting _something_ from him in return. So what did this wolf want?

Dean shrugged. “I missed you.”

“You missed me?” Castiel said, confused. “Why?”

“You… you’re unlike anyone else I’ve ever come across. And you didn’t judge me,” Dean said, looking into the fire. “Did… did you miss me?” he said, gaze dropping to his feet.

Castiel hugged his cloak closer, falling silent. “Very much.”

“Really?” Dean said, looking up to meet Castiel’s beautiful blue eyes. “Me?”

The Omega chuckled. “Of course! I’ve never met anyone like you, Dean. The world has been so cruel to you, yet you remain so gentle,” he said, tilting his head and cocking an eyebrow, as if trying to figure Dean out. “And you’re the only person who has ever surprised me.”

“Me? I-” Dean said, rubbing his neck and laughing nervously. “I’m not really that special.”

“I think you are.”

Dean blushed a deep red. “No, I’m not, really, I-” he said, suddenly cut off by the most musical laugh he’d ever heard. “What?” Dean asked, defensively. “What did I do?”

“Your speckles get so bright when you blush.”

“What? Oh,” Dean said, completely flustered.

“Does your wolf form have speckles, too?”

“I, uh,” Dean said, completely disarmed by the little Omega’s boundless curiosity. “Well, I don’t know if I still do, but I used to. Mom used to mention them all the time, but that was years ago, so…” Dean said, drifting off at the now painful memory.

“Let’s see, then,” Castiel said, grasping Dean’s shoulder.

“My wolf form?”

“Yes!” Castiel said, smiling widely, eyes sparkling.

Dean could never turn down those eyes.

“Alright,” he said, grinning lopsidedly as he stood to his feet. He turned away from the little Omega so as to give himself a modicum of privacy as he removed the clothing he did not wish ripped or constricting him during the shift. First the cloak, then his crude jacket, leaving him shivering in the cold as he worked at his pants.

Before he could complete this task, though, Castiel let out a joyous yelp. “You have speckles all down your back!” Before Dean could react, the Omega was running his hands up and down his shoulders.

Dean gasped and froze, suddenly feeling very hot. “What…” he said, out of breath for some reason. “What are you doing?”

“Tracing them,” Castiel said, as if that was the most normal thing in the world. “They’re so beautiful.”

“What?” Dean said, unable to think clearly with Castiel’s nimble hands brushing against his spine.

Castiel gasped. “I can see pictures in some of them!” he said, focusing on one of his shoulder blades. “This one looks like Duneyr.”

“…The great deer?”

“Mm hm,” he said, tracing another patch at his lower spine. “And these look like a serpent!” he laughed before sighing happily. “You have so many speckles. I could draw in them for hours.”

Dean let out a long, shaky breath, having completely forgotten he was supposed to be cold.

“Oh! I’m sorry! I disrupted you,” Cas said, immediately backing away. With his touch gone, the chill immediately returned, leaving Dean feeling so… _empty._

“What?” Dean said, mind still fuzzy.

“I stopped you from shifting. I’m sorry.”

“Oh, that’s alright,” Dean said, finally catching up with reality and fumbling with his pants. He blushed as he stepped out of them, not sure why he was embarrassed all of a sudden. He’d stripped hundreds of times before.

Before he could dwell on it any more, he shifted forms, falling down on all fours, grateful for the warmth his thick fur now provided him.

“You’re big! And gold as wheat!” Castiel exclaimed cheerfully as he examined him. “And you _do_ still have speckles! All over!” he said, running his hands excitedly through Dean’s thick fur. “How fast can you run?”

[[Me?]]

“Yes!”

Dean sat down as he thought. [[I don’t know.]] Just then, he jumped up and slammed his forelegs down playfully. [[How about you run with me?]]

Castiel tilted his head. “Run with you?”

[[Yes! Shift so we can run together!]] He said, tail wagging behind him.

“I spend so much of my time as a wolf, I’d rather not,” Castiel said, thoughtfully.

[[Oh,]] Dean said, tail drooping.

“But I can ride you!”

Dean froze. [[…Ride me?]]

“Yes!” Castiel said happily. “As soon as we take care of this fire, I can get on your back, and you can run me around.”

Dean had never put out a fire so quickly in his life.

As soon as it was done, Castiel gracefully mounted him, giggling at the feeling of Dean’s fur against the bare flesh beneath his loose cloak. As he strapped his only clothing tightly around him, Castiel asked, “I’m not too heavy, am I?”

[[No,]] Dean said, warmed by Castiel’s nearness. He’d never allowed anyone astride him before, but… it felt so good. [[Now squeeze me between your knees and grab hold of my neck, alright?]]

Castiel immediately complied, cooing happily as he wrapped his arms around Dean’s neck, gripping his fur tightly.

[[You ready?]]

“Yes, yes!” he shouted, and they were off.

Dean didn’t think he’d ever ran so quickly as he did then. He ran through the woods, then out into an open field, then wherever the wind took him. Here, in Castiel’s arms, he felt like he could run forever.

Castiel himself was ecstatic, utterly delighted at the feeling of Dean beneath him, at moving so quickly through the snow, at the the biting cold against his cheeks. “Where are we going?” Castiel shouted over the roar of the wind.

[[I have no idea!]] Dean said, laughing. [[Pick a direction!]]

“Oh!” Castiel said, unfamiliar with such a concept. It was exciting. “That way!” he said, leaning to his right.

They travelled for hours, alternating between running and trotting. They came across streams and forests and small mountains, and each time, Castiel had to pick a direction.

He was so used to his life being perfectly ordered and predictable. But this! Everything was new, unseen. For once, Castiel didn’t know what to expect at every turn.

It was wonderful.

[[Which way, Cas?]] Dean said upon reaching a particularly violent river.

Castiel looked up at the sky, worry etching his face. “I think it’s time we go back to the lake.”

[[So soon?]]

“I’m afraid so,” Castiel said, for some reason not as eager as before.

[[Very well!]] Dean replied, turning around and, using his expertly honed sense of direction, aimed them right back at the lake.

 _Why do I feel this way?_ Castiel asked himself. _All things must end._

They arrived back at the little camp far too quickly.

Castiel dismounted the wolf, laughing as Dean shook himself off and shifted to a human, quickly wrapping himself in his cloak as he got dressed.

“That was wonderful, Dean. I never wanted it to end.”

Dean laughed in between heavy panting. “Well, it had to end, or else my heart was going to burst,” Dean said with a grin. “So, since you won’t turn into a wolf, may I at least guess your fur color?”

“Oh?” Castiel said, cheeks pink from the cold winds. His eyes glimmered mischievously. “You may.”

“Black,” Dean said, putting on the last bit of his clothing.

“What makes you say that?” Castiel responded, coyly.

“A wolf’s fur is at least partially the same color as their hair.”

“Is that so?” Castiel smiled. “Yes, my fur is partially black.”

“Partially, huh?”

Castiel nodded.

“Black and gray?"

"Nope!"

"Black and white then!”

Castiel giggled. “Correct.”

Dean laughed and sighed as he looked back at Castiel, unable to break his gaze from the Omega’s bright blue eyes. “I bet you’re a beautiful wolf,” he sighed happily.

“Oh,” Castiel said, blushing and turning away as the first rays of dawn lit the eastern sky.

“So what now?” Dean asked. “Are you hungry? Do you want to find a den to sleep in for a while? I’ll keep guard for you.”

Castiel’s smile fell. “I can’t.”

Dean frowned, distressed by the tone of Castiel’s voice. “What’s wrong?”

The Omega turned to look Dean in his eyes. His bright, green eyes, green as the leaves in summer. “I can’t stay, Dean.”

“No…” Dean breathed.

“I have to leave.”

“No, please. Please stay,” Dean begged, heart shattering in his chest. “Please.”

“I can’t, Dean. I have... things I must do. Somewhere I must be. I can’t stay,” Castiel said, a new, strange sadness filling his heart. “I’m sorry.”

“Why, Cas? Please. If there’s anything I can do, if I can do any of your work for you, or if I can help you, I’ll do it. Just please don’t leave me.”

“I have to, Dean.”

“Oh,” Dean whispered, something crushing his throat. “For how long?”

“Until next Black Moon.”

Dean bowed his head. “That’s so far away.”

“I know, Dean,” Castiel said, something in his chest aching where it never had before. “But I cannot return any sooner.”

“Why?” Dean asked, heartbroken.

Castiel looked down at the ground, lost in thought. “It's... complicated.”

“Then let me come with you.”

“You can’t. You’ll die. They’ll rip you apart,” Castiel said, reaching to gently lift Dean’s chin to meet his gaze. “I’m so sorry for being so cruel to you, you don’t deserve that. If you don’t want to see or meet me next Black Moon, I’ll understand. You have a life to live here, a home to be made _here_ , in these lands, where you belong. You do not have to wait for me.”

“No,” Dean said, standing up straighter. “I vow to the sun and moon, I will meet you here.”

_Why? Why would he still want to see me?_

Castiel reached up to caress Dean’s cheek with his thumb, looking deep into Dean’s eyes as if to discern some odd puzzle. “You are a strange wolf.”

“You probably mean stubborn,” Dean said, mustering a fake smile.

“Perhaps,” Castiel said thoughtfully, before reaching up to kiss the wolf’s forehead. “May you be blessed on your path,” he whispered. After a long moment, his hand fell from Dean’s cheek.

“Farewell, Speckled Wolf.”

Dean fought his choking throat to speak. “Farewell, Castiel.”

As the Omega turned to leave, Dean whispered, “I’ll miss you.”

Castiel halted in his steps. “And I, you,” he said, softly, before disappearing into the forest.

And the both of them were once again alone.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
>  
> 
> A quick sketch of the den. Because I felt like it.

The days always passed so slowly. The wolf had never felt anything like this, this desire to always be around someone else, to never be apart. But being away from Castiel was torture. It was agony every single month, every single dawn.

At least Dean’s life had improved somewhat. The pack he sought to join was warming up to him, but it was going to take a while. It didn’t help that there were others of a rival pack that were trying to infiltrate them at the same time.

Dean’s timing had always been terrible, it seems.

It could be a bit easier, though. If he mated one of the pack Omegas, cherished them and loved them, the pack would be more open to him.

But there was only one Omega he ever wanted, ever dreamed of. There wasn’t a day that passed that he didn’t think of precious Castiel. He ached for him. One night a month was so little, he almost couldn’t bear it. Each separation was worse, like his heart was being slowly clawed from his chest.

Even after all that, finally seeing Castiel’s bright blue eyes once more, his smile, his face? It made it all worth it. Getting to hold him, speak to him, scent him once more…

And that’s when Dean realized something.

He loved Castiel. Loved him more with each passing month. He wanted to mate him, to hold him and not have to let go, to be always by his side. The wolf knew Castiel might not want such a thing, and that was alright. As long as they could be together, packmates, life would be wonderful

But this interim stage, this point at which they always had to separate? It began to be too much to bear. More and more, he realized that there might be a point when he couldn’t endure anymore, where he might at last fall apart from the misery and pain of it.

Yet Dean forced himself to go on. Because it was worth it. For Castiel, it was worth it. Every second with him was amazing, a light in the wolf’s dark existence, a time when life was good, when life was clear.

When asked what they should do, Castiel would often ask for Dean to surprise him, and Dean would be enchanted by Castiel’s enthusiasm and delight at even the simplest things. What Dean saw his whole life as ordinary suddenly became magical with the addition Castiel’s boundless curiosity. The world became so much more alive, more vivid, with Castiel in his life.

As some way to thank him, to show his appreciation, Dean would make things for him, give him things. First it was a full set of clothes (accidentally too large - Dean’d used himself as a reference), but Castiel was thrilled, and always wore them every time.

Once, it was a salt lick. Dean always had a shard of salt with him whenever he craved it, so he’d given Castiel his own piece. The way his face had brightened and giggled when he first licked it… oh, it lit the night brighter than it had ever been.

Dean started bringing fruits, too, or new foods for Castiel to try, as it seems he hadn’t eaten many. Fortunately, the land on which is prospective pack lived on was rich with fruit. So many fruits to bring his love, to watch him bite into and love every moment of it, to suddenly remember what apples tasted like when there's joy in his heart.

One month, he arrived at the lake a couple weeks early. He had plans. Spurred on by his excitement at seeing the Omega again soon, Dean searched around until he located a cave, not too far away from the lake. Immediately, he began forming a den out of it. This accomplished, he constructed some crude furniture - a table, a couple of chairs, and a bed for him to sleep in while he waited for the Black Moon that also doubled as comfortable seating. There was even a nice fire pit he’d prepared just outside. That done, he made sure it was thoroughly scented so no one would steal it, then buried a line of enchanted dust at the den entrance to protect it. Lastly, he painted runes on the threshold that would both deter intruders and mark the den as owned.

Castiel had loved it.

Dean’s heart swelled at Castiel’s fascination with everything he’d done, delighted that Dean himself had made it, despite the crudeness of the whole thing, asking how he had done it and listening to his every word, completely enraptured.

From that day on, the den was their new meeting place. Dean would arrive a day early to clean it up and get food cooking, heart fluttering at the idea of seeing his love once more.

Oh yes, Dean loved getting and making Castiel gifts. But this night, this night he had something very special for him. He had to wait, though. He wanted to give it to Castiel near the end of the night.

“My family?” Dean said, cocking an eyebrow at the Omega sitting across from him, face lit by a flickering torch on the wall.

“Yes, Dean. I want to know more about you, everything about you. Your family must have been wonderful to have a wolf such as you.”

Dean chuckled at the compliment, blushing slightly.

“I know you don’t like talking about them a lot, but I really want to know. If that’s alright,” Castiel said, looking down upon realizing his intrusion. His eyes, they looked so anxious, so sad. Dean could never bear it.

“Alright, then,” Dean said, rejoicing at Castiel’s brightening face and his wide smile.

_I love you, Castiel._

“Well,” Dean said, pondering where to begin. “My mother, Mary, was our pack leader, strong and wise and kind. She was also our druid, able to perform powerful spellwork. To combat the demons and evil beasts that constantly befell us, she crafted enchanted arrows, arrows that could slay even dark gods. She even taught me a bit of spellwork; she was sure I had the gift.”

“You probably do.”

“Not likely.”

“Well _I_ think you do,” Castiel said, grinning.

“Well, think what you will, it doesn’t make it true,” Dean grinned. “Anyway, my father was a warrior, a defender of our pack. And my little brother, he…” Dean drifted off. “He wasn’t anything yet. But I was in charge of him, keeping him safe and out of trouble,” he said, letting out a long breath at the memory.

“Dean, are you alright?” Castiel said, reaching out to grab the wolf’s arm comfortingly.

“Yes, I’m fine,” Dean said, taking a breath. “Anyway, what happened was my mother became too proficient at fighting demons, so they made it a point to kill her, teaming up to attack her and her whole pack. They killed her, my father, my… brother.”

“Oh, Dean. I’m so sorry. So very sorry.”

Dean shook his head. “It was a long time ago,” he said, averting his gaze.

“The demon must have been after you, too, though. Is it still tracking you?”

“He was, for a while,” Dean said, clenching his fists and his teeth. “Until I shot him. With the last of Mary’s arrows. Right between the eyes,” Dean said, gaze hardening with anger.

“Dean,” Castiel said in his sweet, musical voice, and Dean couldn’t help but soften at it. The wolf immediately relaxed, not even realizing he was tense in the first place.

“Sorry, I-”

“It’s alright, Dean. You have lost much in your life. There’s no shame in mourning.”

The wolf ran his hand through his hair with a sigh. “I know. I just, I wanted to protect them. Protect my brother. And I couldn’t.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“I know. But I can’t help feeling it. I’ve lost them, and now they’re gone forever.”

Castiel’s hand reached gently for Dean’s cheek, so softly rubbing it with his thumb, his hand so very soft.

“And that’s why,” Dean said, straightening himself and reaching for his satchel, “I’m not losing you, too,” he said, bringing out a leather string, on which was was something very special.

“Oh, Dean,” Castiel said, his blue eyes widening as he reached out to touch it. “It’s beautiful.”

And it was. On the necklace hung a bone amulet, smoothed down to a polish and meticulously carved with a line of small runes around the top. It was even inlayed with a small, vivid green jewel. Other than that, however, the piece was fairly simple.

Dean blushed at the compliment. He’d worked on it for weeks, having to start over twice upon making an irremediable mistake. It wasn’t perfectly made, but it was as close as he could get, considering his lack of skill.

“It’s for you, Cas,” he said, offering it to the Omega. Castiel took it gingerly from him and slowly draped it over his neck.

“I carved it with protection and healing runes, so that when you need it, you’ll have it. I even carved it out and put a couple drops of my blood in it and sealed it in - mother taught me that blood magic works best for protection and healing. And, that way, I’ll always be with you, by your side, to protect you, heal you, and keep you safe.”

“Oh, Dean,” he said, holding the amulet up to look at it from every angle, holding it so delicately and reverently. “It’s so beautiful.”

“I want to protect you always, Castiel,” Dean said, swallowing down his fear. “Because I always want to protect the things I love.”

Castiel froze, and, for the first time, Castiel felt his heart stop.

“I know right now it’s difficult, having to wait an entire cycle to see each other. I can hardly bear it sometimes. But, one day, whatever person or thing that holds this power over you will be gone, or you’ll escape from them, and one day you will be able to stay. One day you will be free. I know you will. It’s so painful waiting sometimes, so very painful, but it’s worth it for that day, Castiel. Because I love you.”

Castiel didn’t realize it, but his hands had started to shake.

“I love you so much, Castiel. With all my heart. I know, I know that you probably don’t want to mate. And that’s alright. Just so long as we can be together.”

An unfamiliar choking filled the Omega’s throat as the first light of dawn glowed at the den’s entrance.

“Dean,” Castiel tried to say, for some reason unable to speak the word, having it catch in his throat. The Omega looked up at Dean, bright eyes full of sadness. Wordlessly, he removed the amulet from his neck and offered it back to the wolf.

Dean looked up at him, shocked and hurt.

_What did I do wrong? Did I offend him?_

_Does he… does he hate me?_

“I’m sorry, Dean,” Castiel said, eyes glistening. “I’m so sorry. This never should have happened. I’m sorry to have done this to you, Dean. You mean so much to me, but you have to let me go. I don’t deserve you. Go, find a mate here. Find happiness _here_.”

“No,” Dean said, tears stinging his cheeks. “No. I don’t want anyone else, Castiel. I love _you_. I’ll wait for you, Cas, I’ll wait forever if it means one day we can be together. I want no one else. Please, Castiel. I love you.”

“Dean…” Castiel’s eyes burned with an unfamiliar pain and his chest ached. Ached even more than it had every dawn before. “You don’t understand.”

“No, please. I understand, and I’ll wait. I promise.”

“But, Dean, it can’t work like that.”

“Yes it can! I swear I will wait for the day you can stay and we-”

“I can’t stay, Dean! I can _never_ stay!” Castiel shouted. He didn’t intend to, but he did.

The two of them froze. Their eyes met, and their hearts stopped beating. Their hands even began to shake, but no one spoke.

There was quiet for a very long time. Dean didn’t even breathe.

At last, though, someone broke the silence.

“No,” Dean whispered. “That’s not true. All things end, Castiel. You taught me that.”

“And some things only end after death, Dean,” Castiel said, voice breaking in his throat.

“That can’t be true, Cas.”

“I’m sorry, Dean,” Castiel said, quietly. “I never meant for this to happen.” Silently, Castiel offered the amulet back to the wolf, unable to meet his gaze.

“Keep it, Castiel,” Dean said, unable to speak above a whisper. His gaze dropped to the floor as he shoved Castiel’s hands back towards the Omega. “I made it for _you_.”

There was a long silence before Castiel once more hung the amulet from his neck.

“…May you be blessed on your path,” Castiel breathed as he kissed his precious wolf’s forehead.

Dean never looked up from the ground. He merely heard Castiel’s footfalls as he left the den.

The wolf stood there for a long time, unable to look up from the ground. At last, though, he walked towards the entrance to look up at the rising sun. The accursed rising sun.

And, finally, he broke.

He screamed out, tearing at his hair and falling to his knees, sobbing until his chest hurt, shouting curses at himself.

_I’ve lost him. I’ve lost him forever._

And, mournfully, the wolf howled at the sun, heart utterly broken.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
>  
> 
> The shape of the amulet is very important in wolf culture. In this case, the shape is meant to evoke that of a wolf’s tooth. This symbolizes both the protection of a sharp fang and the healing of a gentle tongue. The runes carved upon an amulet can emphasize this or add to it. For blessings, a wolf (druids especially), would hollow out a part of the amulet and put enchanted herbs or dust or something meaningful inside to aid in the amulet in its purpose. In Dean’s case, it was blood, the most powerful of protection/healing magic (the giving of oneself for another). Also, in wearing it, Castiel would always have a part of Dean near him always.
> 
>  
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>  

_Why?_

_Why can he never stay?_

These questions haunted him. He couldn’t help it, Castiel was always on his mind. Castiel was his whole world, his light, his reason for living.

And now Dean had lost him. Forever.

Even a couple sunrises after the Black Moon, when Dean finally returned to his prospective pack, Castiel still weighed heavily on his heart. The Omega was his true mate. He knew it. Castiel felt so perfect, so _right._

But he could never stay.

The very thought left his soul broken inside, empty and numb. Food lost its taste, day lost its light, life lost its joy. He did what he had to do for the pack - hunt, patrol, anything they needed - but it took so much energy. Everything became so mechanical. His future, once so bright and happy, became naught but a void of emptiness and loneliness. There was nothing left to hope for.

But the night was worse.

Strange how it was now. He’d slept by himself almost all his life. But the knowledge that he would now always be alone?

It was unbearable.

Sometimes, in the depth of night, he would hold the furs of his bed close and allow himself to believe he was holding his love. His precious little love. Imagined his smell, his smile, his eyes, his voice, his bright soul.

_Why can’t you stay?_

He buried his face in the furs, pretending it was his love’s tousled hair.

_Why can you never stay?_

________________________

 

It had been a couple weeks now. He no longer felt unbidden tears fall from his face, and his heart had stopped aching. But that was only because he could no longer feel anything.

It was early autumn, and the trees were alive with color, but everything felt so lifeless and grey. Normally, in a couple days, he’d be getting ready to take the trek to the lake. But what was the purpose now? Castiel probably didn’t want to see or deal with him anymore. And it’s not like it would change anything. Castiel still wouldn’t - couldn’t - stay.

If he even showed up.

But Dean couldn’t help himself. His soul yearned for Castiel. His love. No matter how little the hope, Dean would always return to the lake.

Even though he should have had his mind on something else.

The pack had finally tentatively allowed him to join, as he was a skilled hunter - excellent at archery when few are. After all, he’d been a lone wolf for so long. When in a pack, a wolf can rely on teamwork and knives to take down any prey they needed. But alone? A wolf needed to pick off prey from a distance to keep safe. Only lone wolves and druids knew archery to any extent, and the druids only knew it so they could use enchanted arrows to combat fell creatures.

So he was one of the few archers. And they needed them - a full-on confrontation with a rival pack was brewing. The strange pack wanted their land, as it was rich with fruits, and now they were growing more and more aggressive.

And, at last, it came to a head.

The rival pack staged a full-on guerrilla assault. Shows how desperate they were.

And so Dean and the other archers perched themselves on trees to shoot them down. 

This, of course, made them prime targets.

The wolf reached for another quiver of arrows, as his first had run dry, reloading the bow and taking several more shots.

The tree shook.

Dean looked down to see another wolf climbing up the tree to meet him. He shot it between the eyes. Before he could go back to picking off wolves, however, something hit him from behind.

The strange wolf pinned Dean against the tree, going for his throat with teeth bared. Before she could rip into his neck, though, he stabbed her in the belly with one of the arrows, growling at her.

This merely seemed to anger her, however, and she immediately snapped at his neck, jaws clenching around it.

Dean yelped at the intense pain, feeling the blood pour from the tightening bite. The world started to go black; it became hard to breathe.

In a last-ditched attempt at survival, he shoved her as hard as he could. Surprised at the move, she fell backwards off the branch.

Taking Dean with her.

Her body broke his fall, at least, but he still hit the ground hard, and his throat was still pouring blood. He barely had enough energy to roll off her.

The world grew hazy, distant, dark. Sounds dimmed, light faded around him.

He looked over, sighting a strange wolf that immediately caught sight of him and rushed towards him, large blade drawn.

Dean couldn’t move. He could only lay there, nearly unconscious, as the wolf barreled at him. He felt so tired.

There was a horrible, sharp pain. Yelps. A weight.

Then blackness.

________________________

 

Dean’s eyes slowly blinked open to see the ceiling of the longhouse.

He was in pain. Everything was sore, and his head throbbed. There was something cool and damp around his neck.

“You alive?” Megara, said, a smirk in her voice.

Dean let out a long groan.

“Hey, easy there, Lone Wolf,” the pack druid said, tending to what must be the bandages around his throat. “It took a lot of spellwork and luck to keep you alive; don’t ruin it now.”

Dean let out a long moan as he delicately looked around, careful not to move his neck much. It hurt to move his neck.

He was in the pack druid’s turfhouse, surrounded by other wounded wolves in various stages of wellness.

“Did we…?” Dean said, surprised at how much it hurt to speak.

“Careful, now,” she said, rubbing some more of her healing salve on his throat. “Yes, we fought them off. It cost us dearly, but we won. They’ll no longer curse us with their presence, the assholes.” Megara then reached for a bowl of something and held it up to Dean’s lips. “Drink up, handsome,” she said, grinning.

Obediently, Dean drank up the potion, something green, but not altogether unpleasant. It felt so good in his throat, and he for some reason he couldn’t get enough of it. He was so thirsty all of a sudden.

At last, though, he pulled away, resting against the furs laid out behind him and staring vacantly up at the ceiling. “How long was I unconscious?” he asked, voice scraping his throat.

“Shh,” she admonished. “And three days. We were sure you weren’t going to make it,” she said.

Three days.

Only a couple days to the Black Moon. Any other month, he’d be on his way to the lake.

Something caught in Dean’s throat. A completely different pain that crushed his heart.

_Castiel…_

Dean couldn’t keep himself from thinking of his love, couldn’t keep his mind from wandering to their den. The den he’d made for both of them. The den that was now going to rot.

_Why can’t you stay?_

…Wait.

“What did you say?” Dean said, ignoring the pain in his neck.

“Hm?” Megara said, in the middle of mixing some potion. “I didn’t say anything.”

“No, about the other pack.”

“Shh. And I probably said something like they were assholes, a blight, a curse or something. It doesn’t matter, they won’t bother us anymore.”

“A _curse_!” Dean said, immediately trying to sit up, only to have the druid shove him back down.

“You stay right there.”

“You don’t understand! It’s a curse! He’s under a _curse_!”

“Who is?” she said, confusion etched in her face.

“Castiel! I have to see him! I have to find out how to break it!” He said, trying once more to right himself. Megara just held him down.

“You’re going nowhere. Not until you’re healed.”

“I have to see him! I have to leave now if I’m to see him!”

“Now you calm down and stop talking. You’re just going to make it worse,” she said, sternly. “Don’t be an idiot. You can always see this Castiel again.”

“I can’t wait a month! I have to see him this Black Moon!” he said, struggling.

“Black Moon?”

“Just let me go!” he said, fighting to push himself up. His love was cursed. _His love was cursed._ And no matter what it took, he was going to break it. Just the thought of Castiel under a curse was enough to break his heart. He had to get to him now. Had to set him free.

But getting up was unusually difficult.

“Stop struggling!” Megara said, forcibly shoving him back down.

“You don’t understand!” he said, reaching up to yank her hands away.

But nothing happened.

“What?” he said, utterly confused as he looked down at his left arm.

Only to find it had been cut off beneath the shoulder.

________________________

 

Castiel walked out of the lake, clutching Dean’s cloak close - dry, of course. He’d made sure of that. He always did.

The orange light of late twilight set the forest ablaze before him as he walked towards the den, a dark hopelessness weighing in his chest.

He’d waited all month for this night. And yet he’d been dreading it.

Dean wouldn’t be there. He knew in his heart that Dean wouldn’t.

Yet he dared to hope.

“Dean?” he called out at the den mouth. The dark den mouth. “Dean?” he called out as he walked inside, only to find it littered with leaves, the torch unlit, the air stale.

Dean wasn’t there.

Castiel knew he wouldn’t be. But that didn’t mean he hadn’t prayed that it would be otherwise.

Castiel held the bearskin cloak close. Not because he was cold, but because there was still the faint trace of his wolf’s scent still in it.

_No. Maybe he’s just late._

Castiel knew that wasn’t true. Yet he still dared to wait.

First, he waited at the table, then he lay on the bed. Not because he was tired, but it… it smelled like him. Like his precious wolf.

But Dean wasn’t coming.

His wolf wasn’t coming.

Which was a good thing. Dean could live his life, be happy. Castiel could no longer ruin it. Dean could have his family, his joy, have pups, enjoy the world. This was a _good thing._

So why was he crying?

He clenched his fists so hard they drew blood.

Why did things have to be this way? Why did he have to meet that lone wolf? Why couldn’t he just be content with how things were?

“Damn you,” he growled. He wasn’t sure at whom. At himself, at the world, at fate, at Dean… he didn’t know. “Damn you,” he said as tears ran down his face.

And, for the first time in his life, he wept.

The sobs wracked his little body, making his chest ache as he cried into the soft furs. He nuzzled them close, pretending for a moment that it was his wolf’s chest he was buried into.

Why did he have to be so selfish?

Why did he have to do this to himself, to his precious wolf?

Castiel gripped the amulet up against his mouth to gently kiss it. His wolf’s gift. All this time, he’d wondered what this wolf wanted from him. And now he knew.

Dean wanted his love.

This precious wolf, so selfless and gentle and loving, and Castiel had hurt him. Someone who had suffered so much pain, and Castiel had only given him more.

“I’m so sorry I hurt you, I’m so sorry,” he whispered into the fur.

It felt like forever, but, at last, the tears had abated, and he merely lay in the bed, completely broken, staring at the den wall until the faint glow of dawn lit the threshold outside.

It was time to leave.

Castiel stood up, heart numb, looking down at the warm bed. He gently brushed the furs back into place before running his fingers through the soft hairs.

“You did all this for me, precious wolf. And all I did was hurt you. I don’t blame you if you decide not to forgive me. I don’t deserve to be forgiven,” he said as he stripped off all the gifts the wolf had given him. The pants, the jacket, and the cloak, laying them neatly on the bed.

He wouldn’t need them. Not ever again.

Lastly, though, he took off the amulet, about to lay it in the pile with everything else.

But he couldn’t.

_“I made it for you.”_

Castiel held it against his chest, before finally putting it back on, giving it a gentle kiss.

Silently, he walked back out to the lake, standing there at its shore before finally looking back.

“I loved you, Speckled Wolf,” he said, before stepping back into the lake.

And he was gone.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
>  
> 
> More art! This is just a size reference. After all, for wolves, anything to be worn 24/7 needs to be big enough so that it still fits in wolf form.
> 
> A gift like this is often given to lovers. It’s typically an engagement gift, symbolizing a promise of forever. Well we all know how that turned out.
> 
>  
> 
> **ALSO!** Dean's view of missing an arm is not one I share, this is just _his_ opinion of his situation and what he can do with it.  <3
> 
>  
> 
>  

Useless.

That’s all he was now.

He couldn’t work. He couldn’t fight. He couldn’t run as fast anymore, not in wolf form, not missing a left arm. While he had some skill with a knife, no one wanted to teach him more when there were young pups to teach instead. He hadn’t needed to learn much about knife combat before, everything in him was wrapped up in archery. And now he’d never shoot again.

Because he’d been wounded fighting for them, the pack took care of him and fed him and let him sleep under a roof. But he was nothing but a burden now. Good for nothing. They wouldn’t let him do anything, as they still didn’t fully trust him. So now his life consisted of living in the den with the infirm and the elderly, shoved aside to be ignored.

Sometimes he went outside. But, the way everyone looked at him… he couldn’t take it for too long. Their eyes were full of pity but they turned away when he passed by. The children looked at his stump of an arm like he was some sort of freak. Everyone did nothing but look down on him, as if they were waiting for the day he’d die and stop being their problem.

He wanted to leave the pack. Be out on his own again. But he’d die or starve without being able to shoot his bow. He couldn’t take down prey with a knife all by himself.

He was trapped.

Some part of him wanted to end it all. To stop being a burden on everyone else.

But one thing kept him going.

Castiel.

He had to free Castiel. He had to find out more about the curse. He had to break it, had to free his love.

After that?

Nothing, he supposed. Castiel wouldn’t want a mate that couldn’t care for or feed himself, much less one that couldn’t take care of such a precious Omega as he. Castiel deserved better.

So, before the end, he was determined to free him. To do this one last good thing.

Then he could die.

________________________

 

Dean left for the lake, several days earlier than he usually did. He was slower on three legs than four, so it would take much longer to get there, and he didn’t want to be late. Not after he missed last month.

As it was a fairly warm mid-autumn, it wasn’t cold enough to bother bringing a jacket along yet. Besides, he hated how his left sleeve fell useless at his side, keeping his stump of an arm from holding or gripping onto anything.

Fortunately, he had been able to persuade the pack to loan him a couple hares and some fruit for him to eat while he traveled. It’s not like he could catch anything for himself anymore.

Unfortunately, despite his planning, he was still too slow, as even now the sun was about to brush the horizon. He was going to be late.

Thus, Dean ran as fast as his three legs could carry him towards the den, praying that he wouldn’t be late. He couldn’t let Castiel think he left him again.

But the sun was going down, and the sky was turning orange.

Dean picked up the pace, ignoring the branches scratching his face, only focusing on getting to the den. Getting to his love.

He tripped and fell, rolling to the ground. It didn’t matter. He immediately got back up and kept running. He had to get to his Castiel.

There it was - the den! He’d made it before the sun fully set!

He switched to human form, haphazardly dressing himself as he tried to keep running.

“Castiel!” he shouted, out of breath but filled with joy. “Castiel!”

They’d started meeting at sunset, so Castiel should be here.

But he couldn’t smell him.

“Castiel?” he said upon reaching the den mouth. The dark den mouth. Stale and old, littered with leaves and dirt.

He ran inside, hoping that perhaps Castiel was just sleeping.

No one was there. But he could smell it - Castiel’s scent. Faded and old.

Quickly, Dean lit the torch on the wall, searching for the source of his love’s scent.

There, on the bed. It came from there.

Dean’s face grew pale. On the bed was all of Castiel’s clothes. Even his little cloak.

Dean picked up the cloak, staring at it. What did it mean?

It meant Castiel thought he’d left him. It meant Castiel was going to freeze.

“Castiel!” he shouted, taking the cloak with him as he ran out. “Castiel! Castiel!” he kept yelling as he ran towards the lake.

Where was he? Where was his love?

“Castiel, please!” he shouted upon reaching the lake. The calm, still, silent lake.

“Bastards!” he shouted. “Let him go! Whoever you are that’s got him chained up you let him go or I’ll kill you!” he said before screaming out in agony, falling to his knees as he nuzzled the bearskin cloak.

Finally, he looked up at the sky as the last rays of sunlight began to fade behind the mountains, and he howled mournfully up at the lightless, moonless sky.

At last, though, he fell to his side, holding the cloak close.

“Come back to me,” he prayed. “Come back to me, please. Please, Castiel.”

“…Dean?”

_Castiel._

Before Dean even knew what he was doing, he was up on his feet, arm wrapped around his precious little love, nuzzling into his beautiful, mussy hair. He smelled even better than he remembered.

“Dean, I’m sorry I-”

“It’s alright, Castiel, it’s alright,” he said, kissing his love’s head as he ran his hand up and down his little back. His bare little back.

His love was naked.

“Cas!” he yelped as he backed away, immediately wrapping him up in the cloak, fighting not to look at his beautiful, lithe form. “You need to stay warm,” he said, holding him close once more.

“I didn’t know if I’d ever see you again,” he said, meekly. He was caught up in the heat and depth and feeling of his wolf’s embrace, being pressed so close into his chest, close enough to hear his beating heart. It was so strong. Slowly, he ran his hands up his wolf’s sides, pulling him closer to feel his breathing, his heartbeat.

“I know, I’m so sorry, Castiel,” Dean said, flesh tingling under the Omega’s soft touches. “I was injured and couldn’t come. I’m so sorry,” he said, kissing his head once more. “It killed me not to come,” he said, pulling his love even closer.

“You were injured…?” Castiel said, rubbing his thumb along his wolf’s ribs.

Dean could feel him pressed close all along his body, could feel his every move. Castiel was so beautiful, so small, so perfect…

_No._

Dean immediately tried to move back, held close by Castiel’s grip. Even when he tried to move his hips away at least, Castiel pulled plush up against him, belly against Dean’s hardening arousal.

“Don’t move away,” Castiel said, nuzzling against his chest. He knew it was selfish of him, but he wanted to be close to him. So very close. “I want to listen to your heartbeat,” he breathed.

The wolf trembled. Under Castiel he became so weak, he couldn’t stop himself.

_Oh, Castiel, I love you._

“I’m going to help you, Castiel,” he said, fondly rubbing the Omega’s back.

“Help me?” Castiel asked, pulling away, a smile on his face. “You don’t need to do that, Dean. I-”

Castiel stopped.

“Dean…” he said, hands reaching for his shoulder. “Dean, what happened to your arm?”

The wolf’s gaze fell. For one moment, he’d been able to pretend he was whole. And now it was over.

He couldn’t even say anything. He just turned away in the dark of the lightless night.

Castiel’s hands roamed over his shoulder and stump, making small, gentle whimpers. “Dean, what happened to you?”

The wolf shrugged. “Got in a fight, arm was injured. Got gangrene. Had to be cut off,” he said, gaze never lifting from the ground.

Castiel bit his lip, running his hands up and down the stump, along its little speckles.

“Can you still hunt? Run?”

Dean sighed and shook his head. “Not very well.”

Castiel grabbed the sides of his wolf’s face, turning it to meet his own. “What are you going to do?”

“About the arm? Nothing,” he said, gently pulling Castiel’s hands away. “But that’s alright. I’m here to help you.”

Castiel ignored him. “What are you going to do? If you can’t run, can’t hunt,” Castiel said, eyes darting back and forth in thought, heart racing with worry, “How are you going to… going to live?”

“I’ll be alright. The pack's taking care of me.”

“You’re lying,” Castiel said, fear icing his veins. “Tell me the truth, Dean.”

The wolf shut his eyes for a long while. “Castiel,” he said, very gently, holding his love’s chin in his hand, finally opening his eyes to meet the Omega’s own. He had such beautiful blue eyes. “I’m weak and wounded. You know what that means.”

“No…” Castiel said, heart stopping in his chest. Not his wolf. Not his precious wolf.

“But that’s alright, Castiel. Because I’m going to free you, I-”

“No,” Castiel said, holding his wolf close again, listening to his heart. The heart that wasn’t going to last much longer. Not like this.

Was there anything he could do? Anything?

“Castiel, it’s alright. It’s the way of the world.”

“No!” he shouted, eyes wet as he looked up at his wolf’s stump. The stump that was going to cut his wolf’s life short.

Castiel bit his lip.

There was something he could do. But it was going to be very, very difficult.

The Omega took a deep breath. “I’m going to help you, Dean.”

“No, Cas, don’t bother. I’m not worth it.”

“Don’t say that,” Castiel said, looking up at him. “I just need you to trust me.”

“Trust you?”

“Yes. Please, Dean. Trust me.”

Dean looked down at the little Omega, so close against him, eyes so big and earnest, and he sighed. “I trust you, Castiel. I always have. With my very life.”

Castiel smiled faintly, before grabbing Dean’s still intact right arm and pulling him down. “I need you to kneel with me, Dean. I don’t know if I’ll be able to stand.”

“Cas?” Dean asked as he followed the Omega to his knees. “What are you doing?”

“I can’t explain, Dean. I just need you to trust me,” he said, kneeling in front of the wolf and slowing his own breathing. “And, whatever happens, don’t let me stop.”

“Cas?”

But Castiel didn’t reply. He merely knelt there, head bowed, hands clutched against his chest, there in the near pitch dark of a Black Moon.

And he started to glow.

It was faint at first, a pale blue glow coming from deep in his chest, where his heart should be, before slowly working up his throat.

Dean’s heart froze in terror. “Cas, what’s happening?”

Castiel lifted a finger to his mouth as he opened his eyes. Eyes that glowed blue, and a mouth that shone as if there was some white light within it. “Shhh. Trust me,” he said, in his soft, sweet voice, but amplified as if it were echoing all around them.

_Oh god._

There was magic in him. Magic in Castiel. But the only magical things that roam the world during a Black Moon are…

Evil.

_No._

Cas can’t be evil. He can’t be.

The little Omega continued to glow blue, the glow now spiralling up his arm, finally reaching his right hand, where it glowed a pure white. And, mechanically, the hand clamped onto the wolf’s shoulder, squeezing.

Dean gasped.

He could feel it. The power radiating from it, coursing through him, up his spine, in his heart. It felt like thunder, like lightning, constantly filling him, striking him.

It tingled through his shoulder, down to the end of his stump, where there was suddenly almost an unbearable pain. Yet it felt so good.

But his body wasn’t meant to take such incredible power. His chest ached. He needed air, _he needed air._

The wolf gasped for breath, staring up at the sky as such intense energy coursed through him in wave after wave, with each beat of Castiel’s heart. He could only shudder, frozen in place, gasping for air even as he breathed even more shallowly, heart slowing in his chest. The black world turned white around him, everything grew…so distant…

“D-Dean…come back…” a weak voice echoed out.

His love.

“Cas…” he said, voice trembling. He took a deep breath, and suddenly the world was dark again, dark save for his love’s bright hand. Dean could still feel the power rushing from it, through him. He could hardly bear it.

But that’s not what caught his attention.

It was the magic swirling around his left arm, slowly rebuilding it. Healing him.

“Cas!” He shouted in shock.

How was he doing this? How?

This wasn’t normal healing magic, blood magic. Blood magic glowed deep red, and it was never this powerful. This was blue, bright, pure. Intense.

Immediately, he turned to face the little Omega kneeling in front of him.

And he grew pale.

The light within Castiel, behind his eyes, was flickering, dimming; eyes that were falling shut. And blood was dripping from his mouth and nose.

“Cas!” he shouted, reaching to hold his love’s face with his remaining hand. He was so cold.

“D-don’t let me stop,” he barely breathed out.

“Cas?” Dean said, worry crushing his heart. He felt Castiel start to lose balance, falling back, but Dean gently pulled him into his chest.

God, he was so cold. And trembling.

But his hand held on to Dean’s shoulder like a vice.

The wolf looked over at his left arm, nearly fully healed, glowing bright white and surrounded with a pure blue magic that lit the night, burning into him. He felt like his arm was on fire.

But he had to hold on. He had to stay conscious, despite the surging power. He had to hold Castiel. Keep him warm.

Then, suddenly, the glowing stopped. It all fell away, the pain was gone, the night was black again.

And his arm was whole. His arm was back. His life was back, he could hunt again, run again, hold again.

But he didn't have time to enjoy that. Because something was wrong.

Blood was still pouring from the Omega’s mouth and nose, his eyes were half shut, and he was trembling. No, worse. He was shaking uncontrollably, violently. He was convulsing.

“Castiel!” Dean shouted trying to hold him up, even as he appeared to have no strength left, eyes rolling back into his head before shutting completely.

And he was so very, very cold.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
>  
> 
> A quick doodle of the den. <3

“Hold on, Castiel!” he cried out, picking his love up, still wrapped in his cloak, shaking pitifully.

He needed to get him warm. Now.

Dean ran as fast as he could towards their little den, torch still lit, and lay the little Omega on the bed. Castiel had stopped convulsing, but he was still trembling, and still so very pale. Dean immediately wrapped him in all the furs on the bed, trying to warm his cold little body.

It wasn’t enough. He needed to warm him from the inside.

Dean immediately reached for the small, black cooking pot that he kept under the bed and rushed to the lake the clean it off and half-fill it with water, hanging it over the fire in the fire pit to get it to boiling. Quickly as he could, he formed a makeshift spear and caught a few fish in the lake, setting the meat, a few herbs, and some of his salt lick in the pot to give it flavor.

It wasn’t anything masterful, but it would have to do.

Unable to do anything more with Castiel unconscious, Dean sat by his side, watching over him. He’d stopped shaking, but now was completely motionless, only barely breathing.

He looked so weak and helpless. Dean wanted nothing more than to help him, but he didn’t know what else to do. How do you heal someone injured by magic?

Dean ran a few fingers through his love’s hair, damp with a cold sweat, before he looked down at Castiel’s neck.

And he saw something that caught in his throat.

The amulet.

Castiel had left everything else, but he’d kept the amulet.

“Oh, Castiel,” he said, gently tracing his fingers over it. It meant Castiel wanted a part of Dean near him always, wanted his protection, his healing. “I’ll heal you, Castiel. I’ll protect you, I promise,” he whispered, looking at the dried blood around his love’s mouth and nose. Immediately, he set about gently cleaning it off, revealing his love’s pale, blue lips.

Suddenly, the Omega made a gentle noise.

“Castiel?” Dean said, holding either side of his love’s face.

Slowly, his Castiel’s eyes fluttered open, catching sight of him.

“Can you eat?” he asked, softly, as if speaking too loud would hurt him even more.

At Castiel’s gentle nod, Dean rushed out, grabbing the pot and setting it on the table before scooping out a bit with a spoon, blowing on it to cool it off. Only when he felt it wasn’t going to burn Castiel’s tongue did he bring it over to the Omega, who was feebly undoing the tight wrap of furs around him. Dean gingerly slid one arm below Castiel’s head, propping him up so he could eat without choking. “Here, drink this. It’s broth. It’ll warm you up.”

Castiel blinked in confusion for a few seconds before allowing Dean to feed him. To Dean’s surprise, he slurped down the whole spoonful.

“Careful!” Dean said with a laugh. “Don’t choke on it,” he said, grinning.

Castiel was going to be all right.

“Mmm, it _is_ warm,” he said, delighted at the feeling of it in his belly. “What is it?”

“It’s fish,” Dean said as he blew on another spoonful, this time with a little bit of meat in it.

“But we had fish before and it didn’t look or taste anything like this.”

“Well, that’s because I this time it’s a soup.”

“So fish can taste like this, too!?” he said, eyes wide.

Dean laughed. “Fish can taste a lot of different ways, depending on how you cook it and what you add to it. Open up,” he said, giving another spoonful to Cas, who already looked so much better. He didn’t even have to hold the Omega’s head up this time.

Like before, Castiel gulped down the whole spoonful at once. “That’s so incredible. I wish I could try every way there was to eat fish.”

“Well, I’ll see what I can do,” Dean said with a smile.

It wasn’t long before Castiel had enough of the soup, so Dean hung it back over the fire just in case he wanted more later. When he came back into the den, he found Castiel, wrapped only in his bearskin cloak, trying to stand on slender, wobbly feet.

“Watch out!” he said, rushing to Castiel’s side to catch him when he lost his balance. “Here, sit down until you feel stronger,” he said, guiding Castiel back to the bed to sit on. He weighed so little, like he was made of sticks. It made Dean want to feed him, make him strong.

As soon as Castiel was comfortable, Dean walked over to the table to sit at one of the chairs, resting his arms on the table itself. “I, uh, wanted to thank you,” he said, looking down. “For healing my arm.”

“I am more than happy to have healed your arm. You needed it.”

“But you almost died.”

“Oh, that. I’m… I’m sorry for scaring you. I am not skilled at healing magic, so it drained me greatly. I’m more skilled with light magic,” he said, giving a sidelong look at Dean. “Smiting magic,” he said, staring, ready to gauge his wolf’s reaction.

“Oh,” Dean said, biting his lip, fear gnawing at the back of his mind. “So there _is_ magic in you.”

“Yes.” _Yes, please be scared of me, Dean. Get away from me. I’m just going to hurt you._

The wolf was silent for a long time, lost in thought. “Have you,” he paused, “ _smitten_ many things?”

“Yes.”

“Did… did they deserve it?”

“Yes.”

 _Oh god._ Castiel was dangerous. Powerful.

Frightening.

“What are you?”

Castiel was silent, gaze having dropped to the floor.

“You said you were a wolf, but aren’t a normal wolf.”

Castiel sighed. “No. I’m not.”

“Then what are you? A warlock? One of the Fae?”

Castiel started drawing patterns in the dirt floor with his feet. “I can’t tell you. Just trust me, Dean.”

“Why, Castiel?” Dean said, hurt. “Why can’t you tell me more? Why can’t you tell me what you are?”

“Because… because it would change everything,” Castiel said, sadness in his voice. “You wouldn’t look at me the same.”

“Why, Cas? Are you-” Dean said, heart gripped with fear.

_Magic creatures are dangerous. The things that wander the world during a Black Moon are not to be trusted._

At last, Dean choked out, “Are you something evil?”

Castiel shut his eyes tightly, hurt at the thought of it. “Do you think I’m evil?”

At that, at the pained look in his love’s face, Dean’s heart shattered. “Never, Castiel. Not you.”

Castiel tried to muster a shaky smile, before glancing back at the ground. “When we first met, you asked me whether I was good or evil. And my answer is still the same. I am myself, and that will never change,” he said, drawing more lines with his feet.

_At least, I thought it wouldn’t._

“It’s just,” Castiel continued, “you, Dean, you’re the only person that - that sees me for who I am instead of what I am. And I don’t want that to go away. I-” he said, voice catching in his throat. “I don’t want to lose you, Dean.” _What am I doing? I need to push him away!_

_But I want him._

“You won’t, Castiel,” Dean replied, squaring his shoulders. “Because I’m going to free you.”

Castiel knit his brow in confusion. “Free me?”

“Yes, Cas. I know that you’re under some kind of curse, some curse that states you can only become human on the night of a Black Moon, and binds you to be a wolf somewhere else the rest of the cycle. But all curses can be broken somehow, Castiel. It doesn’t matter how it happened or what it will take to break it - if it takes my heart I’ll cut it out, I don’t care, just tell me what you know, and we’ll figure it out together.”

Castiel gaped at him for a few moments before turning away and regaining his composure.

_How could he want to do this for you? After everything?_

“Am I,” Dean said, taking a breath, “am I right? Is it a curse?”

Castiel swallowed, watching his shadow dance on the cave wall. “You aren’t far from the truth,” he said, drawing the cloak tighter about him. “But there is nothing you can do. I’m bound to it ‘until the twilight of the gods, when the realms will be bathed red with blood and the suns’ rays turned black as pitch.’”

“Well,” Dean said with a wry laugh, “whoever made the curse must have utterly despised you.”

“No, no, it…” Castiel said, sighing. “It’s not like that. It’s complicated.”

“It doesn’t matter. All curses can be broken, somehow. I promise, I’ll free you,” he said, turning to catch Castiel’s demeanor, how he sadly looked at the ground.

And then he realized something. Something that made him feel ashamed for presuming so much. Something that pained him to his very core.

At last, he said, “Do you… _want_ to be free?”

Castiel was very quiet for a long time, lost in thought.

_Do I want to be free?_

Finally, he sighed. “I’ve been like this for as long as I can remember, bound to the cycles of the moon. And, what I am fated to do… I love. Few things give me joy as what my duty, my fate has given me. And, beyond that joy, I was allowed pure freedom one night a cycle. It was everything I dreamed of, hoped for. I wanted to do it forever,” he said, biting his lip. “Then I met you.”

Castiel took a long breath. “You were someone who didn’t see me as something to be feared or as someone strange,“ he continued. “You… you treated me as an equal. In your eyes, I was something precious, and not because of my powers or anything I could do for you. You showed me unconditional love, expecting nothing in return. And I-” he took a breath, “I didn’t know how to handle it. You showed me a world I’d seen countless times before and made it miraculous. You made fish - fish! - into something wondrous, something I could keep discovering. You, you’re so unlike anyone I’ve ever met,” he said, unconsciously playing with the amulet around his neck. “And what once felt like a joy is now a curse without you.”

Dean blinked in shock at the little Omega. _What do I even say?_ “I- I’m sorry I made you hate something you love, I-”

“No, no,” Castiel said, hurt, standing to his now sturdy feet. “That’s not what happened at all. I still love what I do. But, the joy I feel around you is… so much more. It makes me always want to be around you. Near you,” he said, suddenly seating himself in Dean’s lap, straddling him and looping his arms around his neck.

Dean gasped, unconsciously leaning back at the sudden nearness, Castiel’s scent now filling his nose, his body heat pressing against his bare chest. The wolf could only stare into his eyes, spellbound, as his heartbeat and breath quickened.

“When I’m around you, Dean, I want… I want to always be with you. I want you to show me the world, show me all new things. I want to take care of you. I want you to want to take care of me. I want…” he drifted off, dropping his head on his precious wolf’s shoulder, breathing his scent in. “I want to scent you. I want to touch you. I want-” he said, gasping in surprise.

“What’s wrong?” Dean barely breathed out, almost unable to think with his love on top of him like this.

Then he smelled it.

“Dean I,” Castiel said, shock in his voice, heart racing in his chest.

The scent was beautiful, sweet as honey, with a spice and tang to it that rushed through his veins, making him painfully hard.

_Slick._

Dean couldn’t help but moan. “Cas…” he said, brokenly, resting his head on his love’s shoulder. _You already told me you don’t want me like this. Please, stop me, leave me. Your slick is driving me insane._

“Dean…”

Gathering all his willpower, Dean grabbed Castiel and pushed him gently back.

_Oh god._

The little Omega was flushed pink, eyes dark with need.

“I want you, Dean.”

“But you said-”

Before he could continue, Castiel grabbed his head and pulled him in for a kiss.

It wasn’t a deep kiss. It was gentle, sweet, almost chaste.

And Dean fell apart.

He took Castiel’s head in his hands, holding him close and kissing Castiel deeply, pulling a light whimper from his lips before breaking away, kissing along his love’s jaw and down his throat, making the Omega quiver in his arms. “What do you want to do, my love?”

Castiel let out a long, shaky breath, Dean’s gentle kisses making him weak, making him even more slick. He could feel its heat soaking the bearskin cloak beneath him as an ache coursed through his veins, an ache he’d never felt before.

“I-” he said, shakily. All this was terrifying, frightening, wonderful, new, and he felt so selfish for wanting more.

But, god, did he want more.

“I want you inside me.”

Dean drew back with a gasp, pulling back to stare into Castiel’s bright blue eyes, now tinged with gold. “Are you sure this is what you want? I thought you said you didn’t-”

Castiel silenced him with a finger to his lips, before moving his hand to brush his wolf’s cheek.. “I changed my mind,” he said, leaning forward and mimicking Dean’s kisses down his wolf’s jaw and throat, kissing each speckle he found here, wanting Dean to feel the same pleasure he’d given him. Oh, he needed him so much. He _wanted_ him so much.

“C-Cas…” Dean said, voice broken.

“I’m sorry to ask this of you,” he whispered into Dean’s ear, suddenly filling with guilt, “but, Dean, I just ache, I feel so empty, please.”

The wolf groaned, pulling Castiel tighter against him, shuddering when he felt the Omega’s erection. “Don’t worry, Castiel, I’ll take care of you,” he said, standing up with Castiel in his arms before gently setting him on his back on the bed, legs dangling off the edge. Quickly, he set to rolling some of the furs to prop up Castiel’s lower back and hips, to make sure he was comfortable. Finally, he gingerly pulled back Castiel’s bearskin cloak.

“Oh, Cas,” he said, speechless at the sight of Castiel’s naked body.

He was lean, flushed, breathing deeply, chest rising and falling, revealing his little ribs and the curves and planes of his body, all flowing into each other perfectly, as if carved by a master sculptor.

“Oh, Cas, you’re beautiful,” he breathed.

He could help himself, Dean immediately ran his hands up and down his small body, wanting to learn every inch of it, wanting to worship it. Overwhelmed, he leaned down to kiss over his chest and shoulders.

“You’re so soft, Cas,” he said between loving kisses, relishing the feeling of the rise and fall of his love’s chest, the subtle movement of his muscles. “What do you want, my love? Do you want me to knot you? Something else? Do you want me to pull out before that?”

“You can _do_ that?”

Dean chuckled, nuzzling up against him. “I can do anything you want me to.”

Castiel leaned his head back, already so enraptured by his gentle touches. At last, though, he managed to say, “I want your knot.”

He felt Dean shiver above him, falling apart at the request. “Spread your legs,” he ordered.

Cas bit his lip, feeling himself drip with slick at the command. He’d never been ordered to do anything before, and it… it felt _good._

Suddenly, he gasped as Dean started to rub his finger along his entrance, jumping at the sudden contact.

“If you want me to stop at any time, you tell me,” he said.

Cas vacantly nodded, lost at the feeling of Dean fingering his little hole, effortlessly sliding inside.

The Omega keened.

“Oh, fuck, Cas, you’re so tight,” Dean breathed. “Have you done this before?”

“N-No,” he said, breathing shallowly as Dean coaxed him open.

Dean moaned lowly, a dark, possessive growl rumbling in his chest as he nuzzled the Omega’s neck.

“Mine,” he said, sliding another finger inside, the Alpha in him practically roaring at the thought.

_Mine. I have him first. I’ll ruin him for anyone else._

_Mine._

Castiel mewled at the feeling, the stretch of it as Dean opened him up, moving around inside him as if searching for something. “Yours,” he responded.

Dean growled, pulling out the fingers to replace them with two fingers from his other hand as he licked up his love’s slick from his hand, groaning at the taste of it. It was ambrosia, pure heaven, hot and thick with want.

“Let me try,” Castiel said, pulling Dean’s hand up to his face and licking the remaining slick from it, sucking on his fingers to get every last drop.

Dean almost came on that feeling alone, of his love’s tongue sliding across his fingers, of his warm, soft mouth and lips sucking on him.

Castiel smiled at the sweet, tangy taste of it, watching enthralled at what it was doing to his wolf. “That’s me,” he giggled. _**I’m** doing this. **I’m** making him feel good. **I’m** driving him mad._

Before he could finish that thought, however, Castiel yelped, arching his back as Dean’s fingers brushed across something inside him, something that sent a surge of pleasure shooting through his body.

“There it is,” Dean said with a smile, slipping a third finger inside and gently rubbing at that spot inside him even more.

The Omega _keened_ , writhing on his fingers, grasping at his wolf’s arms. “Dean,” he said, lightning coursing through his body at each touch of that spot inside him, building low within him. “Dean,” he repeated, before something snapped deep inside him. “Dean!” he shouted, suddenly tensing as pleasure shot through his marrow, through his very core, pulling him tight, making his cock twitch.

Then he was let go, falling completely limp back on the bed, out of breath.

_Was… was that what pleasure feels like?_

“Oh, Cas,” Dean said, fingers stilling within him, staring at the trembling Omega below him, flushed and shining with sweat. “You came on just my fingers,” he said, staring in awe at his love, who’d come all over himself.

“I’m sorry,” he said, out of breath.

“No, no, you’re perfect. You’re so perfect,” he said, leaning down to lick him clean. “You’re so perfect,” he repeated, incredibly aroused by how sensitive his love was.

That done, Dean stood up straight, slowly pulling his fingers out from his love.

Castiel whimpered at the loss.

“Don’t worry, my love, I’ll take care of you,” he said, softly, licking the slick from his fingers, before undoing the latch on his pants. With a groan, he pulled out his cock, hard and leaking.

Castiel gasped. Dean’s cock was so much _bigger_ than his own, and pointed, with a partially formed knot at its base. “Is mine supposed to be that size?”

Dean smiled. “No, no, my love. Your cock’s perfect,” he said, planting a kiss on its head, making the Omega gasp.

Castiel took a breath. “But - but how is that going to _fit_?”

Dean laughed. “Don’t worry. It will,” he said, taking his cock in his hand and guiding it to Castiel’s dripping hole, setting the head against his wet, hot entrance. “Tell me if you need me to stop,” he said, straining to keep himself from fucking Castiel senseless right now.

Cas nodded, spreading his legs wider.

Slowly - god, painfully slowly - Dean pushed inside him. He almost couldn’t bear it; Cas was so fucking tight and hot, squeezing him, choking him.

The Omega gasped, whimpering pitifully as he felt himself stretch around Dean’s thick, heavy cock, working itself deeper and deeper inside of him. God, it was so thick, spreading him open almost painfully. Even when he thought Dean couldn’t delve any farther, he just kept going, burying himself deep within him. God, he could feel every single inch of Dean’s cock, the width of the head, the swell of the knot catching on his insides and sensitive rim.

At last, though, Dean bottomed out, cock finally fully sheathed deep inside him. The Omega gasped for air, whimpering at the feeling of being so _full_. God, he felt like he could choke on it.

The wolf moaned brokenly. It had been so very long since he’d last lain with anyone, and even then it didn’t compare to _this_ , to his love. He could _feel_ the muscles of Castiel’s channel ripple across him, squeezing him, wanting him.

Oh, he wasn’t going to last long at all.

“You feel so good, Cas,” he breathed. “Are you ready?” he said, almost vibrating with the amount of willpower it took to stay still.

“Please,” he said.

And that was all it took.

Dean immediately pull out before pumping inside Castiel slowly and deeply, each thrust ripping a whine from his love’s plush, open lips.

It was heaven, to please him, to feel him. He wanted to make his love cry out, come on himself again, bring him every pleasure in the world. Wanted to hear these cries every night.

Oh, god, but he couldn’t stand it, not with Castiel whining like that, the sweetest whines he’d ever heard, each time he bottomed out inside him.

Then, then his love spoke.

“H-harder.”

Oh, how could something so base fall from such innocent lips?

And how could he refuse?

Roughly, he grabbed Castiel’s hips and sped up, yanking him back into each thrust, relishing the softness of his round, perfect ass, dripping with slick.

The Omega keened, grabbing onto Dean’s arms so hard his knuckles turned white, breath hitching at the feeling of Dean’s knot tugging at his rim, stretching him wider and wider. He almost couldn’t bear it.

“Oh, Cas, you’re so good, you feel so good…” he said as his knot grew too big to pull out, forcing him into quick, shallow movements, rubbing his knot up against his love’s sensitivity.

But oh, god, Dean wasn’t going to last much longer.

_No, you need make sure he comes._

Desperately, Dean took one of his now slick-wet hands and grabbed his love’s cock, squeezing and tugging on it, making Castiel mewl in ecstasy, then…

Oh, god, he could _feel_ it.

Felt Cas arch his back, felt his channel _tighten_ , rippling and squeezing him, heard him cry out, felt him come all over his hand.

And that was all it took.

Dean tensed as the pleasure building up within him was finally released, rushing through him. He immediately stilled, pulling Castiel flush up against him to get as deep as he could as his cock twitched within his love, filling him up with hot, thick come, the Omega clamping down on him, milking his cock and knot.

Castiel whimpered at the feeling of it, quivering, thighs shaking, body utterly spent.

Dean moaned, propped up on one arm so that he leaned over his beloved, each pump of come sending a shudder through him. He stayed panting there for a moment, before looking down at his beloved, lying there, bonelessly limp.

He took a breath. “Are you alright?”

Castiel nodded with a contented sigh.

Dean smiled, reaching down to grab Castiel’s limp little body, lifting it to lean against him before laying them both down on their sides on the soft bed, wrapping them both in the furs. He took special care to make sure the Omega was comfortable, that he wasn’t crushing him. Throughout all this, Castiel kept his eyes shut, leaning against him, trusting him completely.

For a while, they both lay there, Dean kissing Castiel’s head and petting through his wild hair as the Omega slowly regained his senses. He blinked his bright blue eyes open and nuzzled into Dean’s shoulder, kissing Dean’s little speckles as he felt his belly fill with come, felt the thick knot within him, felt his lover’s cock twitch deep inside him.

This was perfect. He felt so complete, so _whole_ here in his lover’s strong arms, protecting him, warming him.

He wanted it to last forever.

_But you can’t._

Then realization hit him.

_But **he** can’t._

Castiel shook. _What have I done?_

“Oh, no, I’m so sorry,” he said with a gasp. “We can’t keep doing this, I can’t keep doing this to you, making you want me. What have I done?”

“Castiel, it’s alright, it’s alright. Don’t be upset,” he said softly, hurt by his beloved’s pain.

“No, no! You need to give up on me, live your own life, have your own pups. I can’t keep doing this to you, stringing you along month to month. It’s not fair to you, I-”

Dean pulled him close, enveloping Cas’s body with his own, keeping him warm and safe. “But you’re worth it, Cas. You’re worth the wait each time,” he said, running his hands up and down his beloved’s back. “Oh, Cas, I love you so much,” he breathed into his beloved’s hair. “I’ll do anything for you, Cas. Anything. I’ll live for you, I’ll kill for you, I’ll die for you. I’m yours,” he said, holding him tight. “Just tell me, please,” he begged. “Do you want to be free?”

Cas’s eyes grew wet as his wolf, his lover, constantly broke down his every wall, his every defense.

_Do I want to be free?_

And he couldn’t fight his answer. His honest answer.

“…Yes.”

Dean smiled widely, joy filling his heart. “Do you know what we’re going to do when you’re free, my beloved?” he said, happily. “I’m going to make so much food for you. There’s so much to taste - I haven’t even given you honey, yet. You’re going to love it. And I’m going to take you so many places, Cas. You’ll pick a direction and we’ll just go, see what places we find. I’ll show you the warmth of a hot mountain spring, the joy of a field in summer, the salty breeze by the shore of the Great Sea, the cheer in a frozen lake. I’ll share it all with you,” he said, grinning mischievously. “And I’ll find out all the different ways I can please you,” he said, rutting his knot inside his beloved.

Castiel shuddered, grabbing onto him.

Dean chuckled, kissing him fondly. “I’m going to show you everything, Cas. The whole world. And we’ll be together, forever,” he said, sighing softly into Castiel’s hair, unable to see how he was biting back his sobs.

“Don’t worry, my beloved,” he whispered. “No matter what it takes. I _will_ free you, Cas. I promise.”

Silent tears fell down Castiel’s cheeks, each word of his lover like a knife wound in his heart.

Because he knew.

He knew none of it could ever happen.

And, for the first time, he’d been given a glimpse of what he could have had, the life they could have shared. And he wanted it. With all his heart, he wanted it. _Yearned_ for it.

But it could never be.

“You _can’t_ free me, Dean. You can’t,” he said, weeping quietly into his lover’s chest. “You need to give up on me. Please. I don’t want to hurt you anymore. Please. Please give up on me.”

Dean held him close, lifting his chin so he could softly lick up his tears, before leaning down where, one day, he hoped his mating mark would be.

Castiel whimpered. “Please give up on me.”

Dean gave his throat a loving, tender kiss. “Never, beloved.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
>  
> 
> Megara is a wolf druid hailing from Thrace. She’s a young but learned druid, only eighty or so years of age, but she has a skill for enchantments, hexes, and alchemy - thus giving her the title of Megara the Alchemist. Her magic usually involves the mixing of ingredients to achieve a result. In modern terms, she’s a witch.
> 
> She’s a close friend of the leader of the pack on whose land she resides, as her own pack was slain. While she will do work for travelers or members of other packs, she usually does enchantments for her own pack - though, of course, they do not trust her completely. No one trusts a druid.
> 
> While she has done some dabbling in demonslaying, it was only in an apprentice setting. Thus, she has little experience herself in fighting off fell beasts or dark gods.
> 
>  

“Your arm’s back.”

That was the statement Dean kept hearing when he returned. That is, except when one of the wolves got a glimpse of the blue handprint. Then they just said nothing at all.

“That’s not natural,” he heard one whisper.

People didn’t ask how. They didn’t ask why. Which was fortunate, as Dean didn’t exactly know how to tell them about Castiel in a way that didn’t make him sound terrifying.

So, as he walked through the pack, everything was eerily quiet, with all eyes on him.

Dean didn’t care, though; he had other things on his mind. He had a goal, had focus now. He knew what he wanted, and he wouldn’t need this pack much longer. After he freed Cas, he’d start a pack with him. He didn’t need all these people who, just a week ago, treated him like refuse.

But there’s someone he needed to talk to first.

“I wish to speak to the druid,” he said to the wolf guarding the turfhouse.

“She’s been expecting you,” the wolf said, letting him pass.

The druid’s turfhouse was near the edge of the pack’s territory, away from everyone else, as, while they depended on Megara for certain needs and provided her with anything she needed or wanted, everyone was still a bit frightened of her, of her powers. It was and has always been a tenuous alliance. After all, magic is a terrifying thing in this dangerous world.

And anyone who can wield it is not to be trusted.

“You heard the gossip they’ve been saying about your arm, handsome?” Megara said as soon as he walked through the door, not bothering to look up from her books.

“Already? I just got back.”

“Word travels fast,” she said, putting down her book and walking towards him. “After all, the lone wolf goes out to meet someone on a Black Moon, then comes back with his arm? It’s all very suspicious,” he said, unceremoniously yanking his arm to take a look at the handprint.

She knit her brow. “Wolf, this is,” he said, tracing a finger around the outline of it. “This is very powerful magic. I’ve never seen anything like it,” she said, staring at it some more before forcibly turning Dean to meet her gaze.

Her jaw was tight, and her eyes were deathly serious.

“What. Did. You. Do.”

It wasn’t a question. It was a command.

“Nothing; I didn’t do anything,” he said, honestly, though unnerved by her demeanor.

_How do I talk about Cas without making him seem… evil?_

“Oh? Nothing? Am I to expect you just grew you arm back like a fucking bog lizard and the handprint is some kind of birthmark? What do you take me for?” she said, a fire in her eyes. “Did you sell your soul?”

“No, I didn’t sell anything!”

“Maybe not consciously, but shit like this doesn’t come free. So, tell me. Who did this?”

Dean sighed. “Castiel.”

“Castiel? What the hell kind of name is that? Sounds Fae.”

“No, he’s not Fae! He’s…” he took a breath. “He’s who I meet every Black Moon.”

“The one you were so upset about missing last month.”

“Yes. He’s my… friend.”

“But you can only see him on a Black Moon?”

“Yes.”

She cocked an eyebrow. “You _do_ realize how bad this sounds, right?”

“I am somewhat aware.”

“Right. Now, while I’m sure there are some pure, precious little druids out there who might perhaps be able to wield such magic, you sure as fuck don’t find them on a Black Moon.”

“He’s not a druid.”

“Then what is he? A warlock? Some fell demon? A dark god?”

“No! No. He’s not evil.”

“And _he_ told you that, I assume.”

“No, it’s true! He’s good, and kind, and-”

“Then what did he ask in exchange for this?” she said, grabbing his arm. “Was it all our firstborn? The heads of seven Alphas? The hearts of newborn twins?”

“Nothing! He… he didn’t want anything.”

“Oh, and I am to believe this? Fine, then, I’ll play. Why did he do it, then?”

“Because…” Dean drifted off. At last, though, he sighed, heart aching at the thought of him. His beautiful beloved. “Because he… he loves me.”

“Bullshit.”

“It’s the truth!” Dean said, angered at such an accusation. “I don’t know what he is. But he loves me. And he’s cursed. I think the curse has something to do with his powers.”

“Cursed? What, so he’s some dark god only allowed to walk the earth during a Black Moon, and he wants free of his chains?”

“No!” Dean shouted. “He’s not evil! He’d never be evil. He’s just cursed.”

Megara stared at Dean for a good long while, searching for any giveaway, any facial expression, anything that might help her discern the truth.

At last, she sighed, shoulders drooping. “Very well, then, lone wolf,” she said grumpily as she turned away, searching her bookshelf for something. “Is that what you came to me for? You want his curse broken?”

“Yes,” Dean said, some hope rising in his chest. Though, he couldn’t help but feel suspicious. This seemed too good to be true.

“Tell me what you know about it,” she asked.

“Well, he’s like a wolf, in that he has a wolf form, but he’s locked into it except on the night of a Black Moon.”

“So it’s tied to the cycle of the moon?”

“Yes. For some reason.”

“Mm hmm,” she said, pulling down a large tome with the words On Reversing Magic emblazoned on the spine. “What else do you know?”

“Not much. I think part of the curse is that he can’t say much about it.”

“I’ve heard of those. Ha, the fucker must’ve have _really_ pissed someone off.”

“Maybe,” Dean said, rubbing his neck.

_“It’s complicated” is what Castiel had said. What did that mean?_

“Well, it only makes sense,” she said, flipping through the thick, yellowed pages. “Since we can’t discern what the specifics of the curse are, we’re going to have to perform a powerful general-purpose curse breaker on this fucker. It’s going to need some of his blood, though, to make it work - so it breaks _his_ curse, not someone else’s within a couple mile radius.”

Dean nodded, lost in thought. _Makes sense._ “What else do I need?” he said, moving to hover over her shoulder. He didn’t fully trust her, so whatever she said, he wanted to corroborate it with the book.

“Well, the more specific the curse breaker, the better. Also, as this seems to be a very powerful curse, so it’s going to take some heavy mojo,” she said thoughtfully, running her finger down the columns of spells. “Ha! There. ‘Curses related to the moon.’ Ah, well, it seems one of the things you’ll definitely need for breaking a heavy-duty moon curse is a feather from ‘Darkness’s Bane.’ So, the Moon god. Pfft, these books are so fuckin’ formal sometimes.”

Dean knit his brow. “How would I get a feather from the Moon god?”

“Well,” she said, lost in thought. “the Moon god dances through the sky, and sometimes through the mountaintops. Your best bet is to travel to the tops of highest mountains and look for feathers there. But, as the Moon god is the Great Winged _White_ Wolf, seeing it amongst the snow will be difficult. Good thing _I_ don’t have to do it!” she said, clapping her hand on his shoulder.

Dean didn’t care, though. Megara knew the steps to breaking Castiel’s curse, and that’s all that mattered. “What else?”

“Well, we’re going to need some of the greatest altruistic magic there is.”

“Blood magic.”

“You bet your perky ass! But not just any blood - Worthy blood: blood of a Worthy mortal.”

“Where would I find a Worthy mortal?”

“That I don’t know. I have a few ideas where one might be, but you’re going to have to consult someone a bit more educated than me. The Worthy are hard to find, as, being the only mortals able to pass between realms, demons will capture them and drag them to Niflhel where they drain them of their powerful blood for the rest of their lives - or, for the ones that have been gifted eternal life, the rest of forever. It’s quite lovely. So, there are only a couple Worthy mortals that I’ve heard might yet be alive in Alfheim.”

“Right,” Dean said, rubbing the back of his neck. This wasn’t going to be easy.

“One more thing, though, about Worthy blood.”

“What?”

“If you get it - and that’s a big fuckin’ ‘If’ - you’ll need to get the owner’s name. Worthy blood only works if you invoke the Worthy one’s name. I suppose to keep demons from using it, but that didn’t really work well, so whatever. Just be sure to get the Worthy mortal’s name - which won’t be easy, as they fear you’ll use it for dark magic. So you’ll have to convince them you’re honest. Good luck with that.”

Dean nodded, lost in thought. “What else?”

“Well, fortunately for you, handsome, the rest of the ingredients are only _somewhat_ rare. I’ll write them all down for you,” she said, grabbing some parchment and a quill.

It was a fairly long list, with some details of how to find this root or that creature penned in on the sides. Dean watched her like a hawk, but she wrote down the list nearly verbatim from the book. This was legitimate. This was it.

The way to break the curse.

It might take months, maybe even years, to get all these, but he would. No matter what it took, he’d find a way to gather them all. Fortunately, the spell itself, the mixing and the performing of it, was a basic cast - a technique he’d learned from his mother years ago.

He was going to do it. He was on his way.

He was going to break the curse.

“One last thing,” she said, upon completing the list. “You two seem to have a soft spot for each other. That’s good. Mix and cast these ingredients with love. Love makes any spell stronger. Keep it in mind. It might make all the difference. You fuckin’ saps,” she said, shoving the parchment in his pack.

“Now git, lone wolf,” she said. “May you be blessed on your path or whatever.”

Dean let out an excited breath. “Thank you!”

“What do you plan on gathering first?”

“Oh,” he said, lost in thought. “I can probably get some of the lower-level ingredients while I ask around for the blood and search for the feathers. So probably those first.”

“So you’re going to get Castiel’s blood last?”

He laughed. “Obviously - I want it to be as fresh as possible.”

“So you’ll be away until you gather all the necessary items?”

“Oh, hell no! I’m not missing my night with him each month.”

“Excellent. So we’ll see you in a few weeks?”

He shrugged. “Probably.”

“Well, then, feel free to keep your ingredients here, if you need a place to store them. I’ll put them in the lockbox with my enchanted arrows. No one can get in there unless I say the proper incantation.”

“I don’t think I will, but I’ll keep that in mind,” he said, still not completely trusting her.

She looked disappointed. “Very well, lone wolf,” she sighed, waving her hand. “Go, get away, go break your curse. Just don’t break your neck.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
>  
> 
> Here's Meg's crossbow! Megara has to use a crossbow because she isn’t physically intimidating. Besides, she likes it. She worked hard on making and carving that thing, leave her alone.
> 
> Druids, in general, need to be good marksmen because they’re likely to run afowl of some evil beast and need a way to kill it - and approaching evil things is rather unwise. Best to shoot it.
> 
> As for the arrows, well, that’s what makes this special. Arrows made for slaying evil have three components - silver arrowhead, shaft made of black wood and carved with runes, and feathers of a gryphon. Each component must also be enchanted to be more effective. Meg herself isn’t talented enough in enchantments to make arrows strong enough to kill anything greater than a run-of-the-mill demon. She’d need help to make it powerful enough to slay greater demons and dark gods.
> 
> Also, because of the difficulty in collecting and making all these ingredients, she only has a few of these arrows. She’s used them more than once - she takes them out and cleans them after using them. Saves her some effort.
> 
>  
> 
>  

_I’m going to tell him._

Cas sighed as he shifted into his human form, donning the cloak he’d been given.

_He deserves to know, after everything he’s done._

Castiel stood at the Doorway, waiting for the moment when the sun touched the earth, when the Door would open. Part of him couldn’t wait to see his wolf again. The other was terrified of what Dean might do once he knew.

But it didn’t matter. Tonight was the night.

The night he was going to tell Dean the truth.

________________________

Dean trotted briskly towards the lake, enjoying the feel of crunching leaves beneath his large paws and the chill of the late autumn air. While he, himself, was not particularly fond of the cold, tonight that meant something wonderful.

A long night.

And next month would be even longer.

He could barely wait. He wanted to see his beloved again, see his smiling face. Wanted to watch his eyes shine when they saw each other, wanted to see the look on his face when he tasted of the small vial of honey he’d brought, wanted to hear his voice, wanted to hear his laughter as they spoke of everything and of nothing at all.

Wanted to touch him.

Oh, he could not wait for the day his beloved would be free. When he could see Castiel every night, have him with him always.

Though that day seemed afar off, Dean drew closer to it every moment that he worked to gather more for the spell. As of right now, Dean had only collected one ingredient - horn of a golden stag, the easiest one to obtain. Besides a bit of information on the rarer pieces, that was all he’d accomplished in one month.

It was devastating, only gaining so little. This venture was not soon to end. But that’s alright. It was worth it. For his Castiel, it was worth it.

At least he didn’t have to carry it all; he could leave some of it at Megara’s turfhouse for safekeeping, with the horn he’d left there a couple days ago. But not all of it. He didn’t trust her with the rarer items.

Dean took a deep breath of the crisp, fresh air. Soon, snow would be dusting the earth, cleansing the ground. Then things could grow again, alive and new. The cycle of the world, all as they should be.

So why did something feel off?

He didn’t know what it was, but something just didn’t feel right. Was it the weather? The air? Something he’d eaten?

He didn’t know. But there was a sense of foreboding in the air, as if something terrible was about to happen.

True, there was always a quiet stillness before a Black Moon, with all the creatures hiding from the evil and fell things that would be released in the blackened dark.

But this was different. Different for a reason that wasn’t immediately obvious, but that slowly encroached on his peripheral vision, gathering behind him like a storm.

There were too many crows.

They were all about, as if watching him, following him, amassing around him.

It wasn’t natural.

And now that he noticed it, he couldn’t stop seeing them. They were everywhere, more and more as he continued. Perched on the trees, on the ground. And all silent.

It was eerie.

Unsettled, Dean picked up the pace as he approached the den, glad he’d made it before sunset. He haphazardly shifted back to a human form and clothed himself, setting about cleaning up the den.

He couldn’t shake that sick feeling in his stomach, though. The feeling that something was wrong.

Cawing.

Dean turned to the den mouth, seeing the few peeking heads of several crows, now cawing loudly.

A chill crept down his spine, and he didn’t know why.

Were these crows a warning? An omen?

Whatever they were, it didn’t matter. They meant something was wrong. Something was very wrong.

He needed to warn Cas.

Dean drew his jacket tight as he clambered out of the den into the red glow of an autumn twilight, and his stomach dropped.

The ground and trees were covered in crows. Hundreds of crows, all staring at him, all cawing.

Something was very, very wrong. He needed to find Castiel and get them out of here. _Now._

“Cas…!” he yelled out.

And that was it.

The crows lept into the air, attacking him, biting him, fluttering all around him, wings beating deafeningly in his ears.

“Cas!” he shouted, covering his eyes with his arm and running as fast as he could towards the lake - where his beloved always came from. He needed to warn him, needed to stop him, he-

Dean tripped, utterly swarmed by countless crows. His ears and neck were littered with bites and scratches, but he ignored them, standing to his feet to keep going.

He couldn’t see, but he could tell by the splash of water and the rush of ice cold shooting up his legs that he’d made it to the water.

“Cas!” he shouted.

Then.

Then he couldn’t move.

He couldn’t do anything. It was as if every muscle of his was pulled taught and held there, straining.

All at once, the crows flew away to somewhere back behind him. But he couldn’t turn to see why.

“C-Cas…” he breathed through frozen lips.

Violently, he was yanked down to his knees, as if strings were attached by hooks to his flesh, ripping him down into the ice cold water.

He could only kneel there, face pale, shivering, breathing heavily in terror as he looked desperately around for what force could be compelling him to do this.

Blue lights glowed from behind him as, before him, the red sun dipped ever closer towards the earth, beyond the lake.

Dean could not help but clench his jaw and shut his eyes at the sound of footsteps behind him, not daring guess as to whom or what those footsteps might belong. But it didn’t matter. If he had to fight or bargain, he’d get them away from Cas. From his beloved. No matter what it took.

A figure came into view, circling around him.

She wore a black, ankle-length, fur-lined coat with hood pulled over her features, a blue lantern hanging from her hip as she moved, her steps so elegant as to leave no ripple the water.

She stood before him. Dean didn’t deign to look up to meet her gaze, but the action was fruitless, as she lowered her hand, her long, graceful fingers hooking under his jaw and lifting his defiant eyes to meet hers.

She bore a smirk, and a long, curling shock of hair, red as fire.

“We have a handsome one, here, don’t we?” she said, her voice lilting and beautiful.

“What do you want with me?” he said as more footsteps gathered about him.

“You?” she laughed, a dark, musical laugh.

Another figure came into view, dressed all in grey and white with a similar lantern on her hip and a crow perched upon her shoulder. But that’s not what he noticed first.

No, he noticed her eyes, pure white and sightless.

“Pamelia…” he breathed, going pale.

“Oh, so this wolf has heard of me?” he said, grinning.

_Pamelia. The druid. The Psychic. She-With-Crows-For-Eyes._

“So the crows were you,” he said, forcing his voice level and cool. She gave him a mock bow.

_What is **she** doing here?_

“I _can_ hear you. Do you want me to answer?” She chirped.

“No,” he said, turning away from her.

Only to see someone else at his other side.

“Megara?!” he said, shocked.

“Heya, handsome,” she said with a wink. “Don’t worry, we aren’t here for you. All you have to do is stay right there.”

“Why? What do you want of me?”

The redhead chuckled.

Megara grinned. “If I’m correct, a warlock, a high demon, or a dark god is set to arrive here any minute. Things could get ugly, and we don’t want you causing any fuckups.”

Dean’s heart stopped.

_A dark god. Here._

“Are you even a _match_ for a dark god?” He asked.

“Me?” Megara asked, pulling out her crossbow from the latch on her back. “No. Which is why I requested Pamelia and dear Rowena to join me. Who else could imbue an arrow with enough spellwork to kill anything?”

“Rowena?!” Dean said, looking up at the redheaded woman in front of him.

“Pleased to make your acquaintance,” she said, mockingly.

_Rowena the Red. The Enchantress. The Blood Mage. The one who puppeteers men._

Dean started to shake. Two powerful and dangerous druids were only meters away. Any second Rowena could flick her wrist and snap his neck so that they might feast on his heart for strength.

“Oh, stop, we aren’t going to eat your heart,” Pamelia said, annoyed, stepping towards him.

“Then why don’t you let me go?”

"Because we need you."

"Why? Why would you need me except for sacrifice?"

“Because this creature we’re after, you… you seem to have formed a connection to.”

“What do you mean? I-” he said, cutting himself off when the realization hit him, turning the blood in his veins to ice. “Cas…”

“Oh, so he isn’t completely idiotic,” Rowena said, stepping away as Pamelia took her place. “Why else do you think we had Pamelia’s crows track you since you left Megara’s house?”

“No!” he shouted. “Cas isn’t evil! You can’t do this!” he said, trying to shake free of Rowena’s hold on him.

“Oh, don’t be stupid,” Megara said, loading her crossbow and rolling her eyes. “Only a demon or warlock would have enough power to heal a limb on a Black Moon. Besides, only evil things wander the world on such a night - it’s a wonder we haven’t encountered some by now!”

“No! No, you have this all wrong!” he said, getting desperate. “He - he was able to pass over enchanted dust! I checked!”

“That’s serious,” Rowena said, lost in thought. “That means it must be incredibly powerful.”

“A dark god, then?” Megara said.

“It seems so.”

“No, no, please!” he begged.

“Use your eyes, wolf!” Pamelia said. “This creature is an incredibly powerful dark force. Who knows how many he’s killed? How many he’s planning to kill? Things like him can reduce entire civilizations to ashes. He must be killed before he can harm anyone else.”

“No! He isn’t evil! He would never be evil!”

“Of course you think that!” Megara snapped. “Don’t you see? He put you under a spell! You’ve been bewitched! The only question is why. Why _you_? What does it want with you?”

“No, it isn’t like that, it-”

Then, suddenly, Pamelia touched his forehead, and a horrible clawing numbness ripped through his mind, making him roll his eyes back into his head. It seemed to last for hours, like his mind was being shredded, torn apart, stripped away.

Then, it was over.

Dean gasped as he came back to his senses, mere seconds later.

“That’s it,” Pamelia said, worry lacing her voice.

“What is it?” Megara asked.

“He’s lain with it.”

“He fucked a _dark god_?”

“To put it eloquently,” Rowena said, rolling her eyes. “The god must want to birth a cambion. This does not bode well. Last time a cambion walked the earth, millions paid the price in blood.”

“No! That’s not it! That’s not what he wants!”

Rowena cocked her eyebrow. “It was _he_ who instigated the fornication, is it not?”

“It-” Dean said, shaking his head. “It’s not like that! Please!”

_It **couldn’t** be like that. Castiel couldn’t be evil. He could never be evil._

“Keep telling yourself that,” Pamelia said, turning away from him.

Suddenly, Rowena flicked her wrist, and Dean’s body was instantly twisted, limbs and body contorting painfully.

“Nothing personal, dear,” the redhead said over his pained cries, a smile on her lips. “But judging from that handprint and that arm of yours, this dark god seems to prefer you whole.”

“Don’t do this. Please.”

She didn’t reply. She merely spun her wrist.

And broke his arm.

He cried out in pain, only to hear something horrifying cross his ears.

“Dean!” a distant voice called.

_No._

“Cas, no!” he screamed, just before another bone was snapped. “Cas, _RUN!_ ”

________________________

His wolf’s voice. It was crying through the Doorway.

Dean was in pain.

“Dean!” he shouted, something within him tearing apart at the cries of anguish sounding from the other side.

Someone was hurting his wolf. Hurting his Dean.

“Cas, no!” he heard, just before another scream, sending a white hot anger coursing through his veins.

_Whatever are you that dares touch my wolf? I’ll rip you apart._

Castiel turned, anxiously watching the sun dip closer and closer to the horizon. “Please,” he whispered, “Please open.”

“Cas, _RUN!_ ” he heard his wolf shout.

“Don’t you worry, Dean,” he whispered to himself. “Whatever these creatures are, I’ve killed millions like them. Don’t you worry for me,” he said, eyes glued on the red sun. “Just hold on, Dean. Hold on.”

Another scream.

_I’ll kill them. I’ll burn their hearts out._

The sky set the world aflame with red as the sun at last kissed the earth, and the Door of Night opened at last.

Immediately, Castiel passed through, up, out of the water, completely dry, eyes and veins glowing bright with anger and power.

_Oh, these are they that dare harm my wolf? Three druids? Mortals no less?_

He raised his arm to smite them, hand glowing white hot as the one of them raised her crossbow.

Fool. I fear no mere arrow, no mere bow.

Their deaths would be quick.

His eyes glowed bright as he prepared to strike, prepared to smite them and burn them out from the inside, burn them for daring to harm his wolf, and-

_Snap._

And, suddenly, something hit him.

It was… strange.

He’d been hit with thousands of arrows before. Some stuck in him, some bounced off. But they were nothing to him. They’d always been nothing to him. He’d pull them out, burn them to ash in his hands. They were less than a breath of wind.

But this was… different.

_What is this? This feeling?_

Castiel faltered, arm shaking.

There was - there was an intense feeling in his chest, unbearable, sharp, a ripping, a tearing. Breathing only made it worse.

_Is this… pain?_

“Cas!” he heard his wolf shout, but he seemed so very far away, or so close, or echoing around him, he wasn’t sure.

The Omega gasped for a deep breath, but it only caught in his throat. He tried to steady himself, but he felt so _weak._

Castiel fell to his knees in a darkening world, looking down at the shaft stuck deep within him, in shock at the sight and feel of hot, red blood pouring from the wound, spilling from his mouth.

The Omega started to tremble in pain and confusion.

_What is happening?_

He looked up at his wolf, who seemed frozen in place, a look of horror on his eyes.

_No. I have to protect my wolf. I have to protect Dean._

He raised his arm again, mustering his last remaining strength to try and fight these mortals, even though he couldn’t - he couldn’t quite see them. The world was so dark…

_Snap._

More intense pain shot through him, and all his strength left him.

“No, please!” he heard his wolf cry out.

“I…” he tried to whisper, though it was caught in the sickening gurgle of his own blood. “I…” he murmured as he lost balance, falling to his side in the shallow water, struggling to breathe as his his blood stained the lake red.

“Cas!” Dean shouted, struggling against the druid’s hold on him, heart broken within him, tears streaming down his face.

“ _Cas!_ ” he cried out, voice shaking.

But Castiel couldn’t hear him anymore.


	9. Chapter 9

“Well, _that_ was a lot easier than I thought it would be,” Megara said with a smirk as she reloaded her crossbow.

“Don’t be so hasty, dark gods never die easily,” Rowena said, striding closer to the tiny, gasping figure, whose blood had already thickened and reddened the water around it.

“I’ll kill you,” Dean growled from behind them, face wet with hot tears. “I’ll hunt you down and kill you all.”

“Of course,” Rowena said off-handedly as she snapped her fingers - and another one of his ribs.

“So how is it?” Pamelia said, walking up to the other side of the thin creature that merely looked up at them with bright blue eyes, struggling to breathe. It seemed to be trying to speak.

“Hm,” Rowena said, lifting a foot to kick the dark god onto its back to get a better look at its wounds. The little thing yelped at the gesture.

“Leave him alone!” Dean cried out from behind them, beginning to weep. “Just please, leave him alone, please…”

“Did the enchantments work?” Megara said, trodding up to the other druids encircling the now helpless god.

“I believe so,” Rowena said, noting the lack of strength and the utter defenselessness the creature had.

“But you’re not completely sure?”

“It’s hard to be sure when -”

So Megara shot him again.

The creature cried out in pain, cut off by a choking in its throat.

“Stop it!” Dean shouted. “Stop it! Haven’t you done enough?!”

“Right in his heart! That’ll get him for sure,” she said, smiling proudly.

“Congratulations, you were able to shoot through a creature’s heart at point-blank range,” Pamelia said, dryly.

“At this point you’re just wasting arrows,” Rowena said with a sigh.

“No, I'm not,” Megara said, kneeling by the small dying creature’s side. It kept its eyes on her, watching her with the bluest eyes she’d ever seen, almost glowing in the cold light of their lanterns. “What’re you looking at?” She said, spitting in its face, making it look away. At last, she dared to touch the creature’s body, cold and soft and bare under a now blood-matted bearskin cloak. “No wonder Lone Wolf wanted to fuck you, you donned such a pretty body,” she said with a smirk as she reached for the arrow buried in the beast, deliberately shot into its belly. To kill anything that might have been growing within it. She jimmied it in its flesh and ripped it out.

The creature yelped.

“See?” Megara said, grinning. “I’ll just reuse the arrows not in its heart.”

“Yes, we’re very proud of you,” Rowena said, annoyed at the delay.

Just then, a low rumble caused ripples on the lake.

“What was that?” Megara asked.

“Fell beasts,” Pamelia said, her crows giving her sight for miles. “Only a few minutes from here. They’re gathered almost in a circle, coming here.”

“Fucking thing called for backup,” Megara said, grasping the next arrow tighter. “Fuck, it’s stuck,” she said, half-standing and bracing the creature with a boot while she pulled on the arrow.

The creature cried out pathetically in pain even as blood poured from its mouth, tears falling from its fading eyes.

“Gotcha!” She at last said, holding the blood-drenched arrow triumphantly, replacing it in the quiver on her back.

“The beasts might try to remove the last arrow, as well,” Rowena warned.

“Hm, good point,” Megara said, thoughtfully.

“No!” Dean shouted. “No, they’re coming to kill him! Leave him alone! Please!”

Megara again knelt by the creature, the god that had mere minutes ago been one of the most powerful things to touch Aflheim, and was, now, being poisoned by the dark enchantments etched into the arrow buried in its heart.

“You…” the thing tried to say, but its voice was too weak.

“Speak up!” Megara jeered, slapping its face. “What is it? Did you want to tell us how much you wanted to eat our hearts, devour our children, burn our earth? How sorry you are that you won’t get to now because you were fucking killed by three ‘pathetic mortals’? Is that it? Speak up!” She said, hitting it again.

“You… you don’t know what you’re doing,” it at last whispered out, almost half in silence as its throat filled with blood.

“You bet your ass I do,” she said, grabbing the arrow deep in the creature’s heart and giving it a sharp twist, ripping the tiny beast’s heart further even as it filled it with killing magic.

The little creature could only whimper and shake, the pain was so great.

“Please…” Dean whispered between sobs. “Please, stop.”

At last, she broke off the arrow, leaving the poisoned tip inside the beast’s black heart.

“Ah, what’s this?” Megara said with a smile as she reached for something glistening in the water.

“Megara, we don’t have time for this!” Pamelia said, irritated.

“But look!” She said, drawing out a pendant of some sort that had been hanging from the beast’s neck - it looked like a tooth with some sort of green stone in it. “Oh, so this is how you were controlling him!” She said, yanking it off the creature’s neck. “‘Dean will forever protect and heal Castiel,’” she read with a grin. “How precious,” she said, tossing the thing into the lake. 

“No…” the creature whimpered.

“There!” She said, twirling happily to face Dean, whose bright eyes were filled with sadness.

And hatred.

“You’re free now! I’ve broken the spell. You don’t have to want to fuck a dark god anymore.”

“I’ll kill you.”

“You’re welcome, Lone Wolf. See if I ever do _you_ any more favors.”

“Come on, move!” Rowena shouted as the deep rumbling grew ever more loud, and tall figures rustled in the surrounding forest.

“Fine!” Megara said, taking off in the direction of the river with her two compatriots, who seemed to disappear in a cloud of crows.

And, just like that, they were gone.

________________________

Suddenly, the grip on Dean’s veins was released, and the wolf fell limply into the water as the pain of his broken bones surged over him.

But that didn’t matter.

“Cas…?” Dean said, crawling through the lake on his one unbroken arm and leg in the nearly pitch black dark, guided only by the awful aborted gasps of his beloved. “Cas?” He asked, ignoring the loudening rumble in favor of kneeling by his Omega and holding him close.

He was so cold.

“Shh, shh, I got you,” he said, tears falling down his face, heart aching in his chest, breaking into a thousand pieces. “I’ve got you,” he said, giving his sweet face gentle kisses. “I won’t leave you, I promise,” he said, looking down at the Omega.

But Castiel didn't return his gaze. His eyes were so unfocused, so dim, and the horrible gurgling croaks in his throat soon turned into the unmistakable sound of death rattles.

“Please, please hold on,” Dean wept, knowing the sentiment was futile, pressing his lips against his beloved’s, but tasting nothing except the sickening metallic of blood.

“I’m going to try to lessen the pain, alright?” He said, voice as soothing as he could make it as he wiped some of the blood pouring from his broken arm on Castiel’s open wound. On his heart. That done, he started trying to chant a spell to decrease the pain, the wound starting to glow deep red with blood magic.

But he didn’t get to finish.

A roar split the night, high-pitched and piercing, so loud that Dean screamed in pain as his ears bled.

He looked up to meet the gaze of no less than several dozen fell beasts, eyes glowing red, their black flesh melting to give way to new disease, falling into the lake the slither and infect, skulls and horns sharpened and dark with blood. One in particular stood so tall as to peek above the trees, all matted fur and cracking bone and flaying skin.

All staring at Castiel.

“R…r…” Castiel tried to say, tried to warn his love with the last of his strength, but he couldn’t speak. His body had stopped shaking, it didn’t even have strength enough for that, but his lips, his tongue failed him.

_Run, Dean, please… I can’t protect you from them anymore._

“I won’t leave you,” Dean said, baring his teeth at the horrors and monstrosities before him.

Dean painfully reached behind him to pull out one of his crude, hand-made enchanted arrows, grasping it like a knife.

The sounds of countless feet splashing in the lake, the fluttering of skin-stretched wings, the rattling of bones, the celebratory whoops of the Fell filled the air as they made their way unfearing towards him.

“We’ll eat your eyes,” they whispered at him.

“We’ll skin you alive and wear you.”

Dean held his love close, his love that was barely croaking anymore, his love whose eyes had already faded to grey. The wolf’s heart ached hearing him in such pain, at knowing how soon he would be gone, tears burning hot against his skin.

He clutched the arrow tighter. “I’ve got you Castiel. I won’t leave you. I’ll never leave you,” he prayed into his love’s now-deaf ears.

“We’ll take your flayed still-living body and pierce it on our horns so that your cries fortell our arrival,” one said, laughing impishly.

Dean took a deep breath, smiling determinedly. “If you’re so sure,” he said with a growl. “Then come and get me.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _So, here it is: the last chapter, the binding of loose threads, the end of the story._
> 
> _Thus, I strongly suggest you re-read the last nine chapters to pick up on storylines, on things merely hinted at. Because, at last, here, everything has purpose, as, before even writing the first word of the story, this was the ending planned. Everything leads here. Everything ends here._
> 
> _Here’s to the end._
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  

They descended on him all at once - pecking, scratching, biting, slicing - but he didn’t even feel it. Dean merely held his beloved close, shielding him with his body, using his arrow to stab and cut with an almost chilling calmness.

Castiel was going to die with dignity, not left to be picked apart by beasts. He deserved far better than that.

It wasn’t long before Dean was covered in their blood like warpaint, his own blood intermingling with theirs. For a moment, they pulled back to stare at the gore-drenched warrior before them, breathing hard, guarding his love even when he might already be dead. Not that it mattered. All that mattered was that he was close, that he was protected.

Dean growled, blood burning feral in his veins. “You will not take him!” He shouted, the runes along his enchanted arrow glowing with power at the beasts’ nearness.

Suddenly, claws buried themselves in his shoulders, ripping Dean backwards with sore-covered wings. The wolf roared in anger, spearing the beast and rushing forward to clutch his beloved once more, but more and more creatures kept grabbing him, latching onto his limbs, pulling him back, laughing maniacally. He kept fighting, flailing wildly with his arrow, but more kept on coming, before finally tearing the arrow from his grasp.

“No!” He shouted, reaching for Castiel. He had to get to him. He had to protect him. Had to protect his beloved.

Yes, even as the beasts began clawing at him, ripping him apart, pulling and cutting and scratching, he could do nothing more than reach for the Omega.

Do nothing but watch.

________________________

The Great Fell Beast chuckled as it used its razor sharp forelimbs to pierce through each one of Castiel’s shoulders, pinning them down.

A pathetic sound creaked from the little creature’s throat as some last light flickered in his eyes.

“Do you hear me, ‘Castiel’?” The Beast whispered down into his ear. “Do you hear me? Do you hear the sound of your protector being torn apart by beasts? Do you hear it?”

Tears fell from the small creature’s face as it looked towards his wolf, who, even now, was fading from this world as his blood poured into the lake.

“Oh,” The Beast said, running its long, inhuman mouth along Castiel’s flesh. “Oh, how I have longed for this. To see you like this. And your kind take so long to die, don’t they? Even when you’re filled with enough killing magic to fell ten gods, your body holds on long enough to make sure you’re overtaken by so much pain that your mind is ripped apart,” he said, licking Castiel’s cheek. “Oh, what a pleasure it is to watch.”

But Castiel ignored him. He could only see his wolf, his precious Speckled Wolf, as it reached for him, somehow still thinking of Castiel even in such pain.

And, now, for loving him, Dean was going to be tortured for months, years by these fell beasts. Just for their amusement.

And there was nothing he could do. He couldn’t even breathe.

He could just cry as the world grew dark. So very dark.

But as he watched Dean’s bright green eyes start to fade only meters away, he reached back best he could with his arms pinned, heart aching within him, and, finally, he uttered one last barely audible word.

“D…Dean…”

________________________

_What makes a mortal Worthy?_

_What makes a mortal true, faithful, brave enough to be considered such a thing; so admired by the heavens, by the spirits of world, that even their blood is given powers beyond what they could even imagine? What makes one so blessed, so strong of heart that their very existence is a light shining in the dark?_

_No one knows. Some say it is a gift, others a curse; but there are two things that_ are _known about the Worthy:_

_The power of their spells is awoken by their name…_

_And the power of their spells is multiplied tenfold when made with love._

________________________

Something shone in the water some distance away.

At first, no one knew what it was. It just shone a deep, powerful red, first dim, then brighter and brighter as its magic swirled and filled the lake.

Finally, the object at its epicenter rose from the water, its beaming brightness so intense it almost burned to look at.

It was a simple thing. Crudely polished bone, inlaid with a fair green stone.

But what really shone were the runes carved along its rim:

Dean will protect and heal Castiel forever

The Worthy blood within seeped through the runes, shining so bright as to rip through the lesser beasts, tearing them to shreds. The deep red magic reached for Castiel, swirling around him, before slipping into his mouth, into his wounds, its intensity making the earth shake.

The Great Fell Beast leapt back in terror at the display as the magic sewed tight Castiel’s wounds, yet still with so much power left over that it reached for Dean to heal him as well, breathing life and strength back into them both, before, at last…

The world was dark again.

Dean and Castiel breathed unburdened for a brief moment before countless roars of anger filled the air. Every fell creature for miles, drawn by the glow of red, rushed towards them, towards Castiel, towards Dean, determined to undone what Worthy Blood had wrought.

But they never stood a chance.

Dean, in confusion, looked over at Castiel, who, suddenly, was glowing bright white, bright as the sun, so that he could barely look at him, before a beautiful figure emerged from the brilliance. It was great and terrible, tall as a workhorse, and standing on four powerful legs. It was both white and black, the white beaming as if made of light itself, and its eyes gleamed a pale blue. Its form was like that of a wolf, but springing forth from its shoulders were wings so great as to block out the sky, yet so bright as to give daylight to all those beneath it.

The Great Winged White Wolf. Darkness’s Bane.

The Moon God.

Castiel.

Dean could do nothing but stare. There seemed to be no noise as it rushed back and forth across the lake, quick as lightning, slaughtering and smiting each beast that dared meet his gaze. All across the lake, everything save Dean that looked into the Moon God’s eyes or felt the Moon God’s touch fell down dead, heart stopped in its chest, the blue light from his gaze burning off their flesh. Dean was nothing but an ant to such a god, nothing at all compared to the very Moon itself at war.

It was terrifying.

The light itself seemed to sear deep into Dean’s bones, its power akin to what he’d felt when his arm was being healed, yet all over, so intense as to render him unable to move. The wolf struggled to breathe with such intense power enveloping him, surrounding him, burning his lungs, shocking him, sending him into violent convulsions. After all, he was nothing but a mere mortal - a mortal standing meters away from an angry god.

And it was killing him.

At last, though, the glow disappeared, the grip on Dean’s heart released, and he could breathe freely again, body trembling in fear.

Finally, Dean dared to look towards where the brightness had once emanated, only to once again see the small, graceful form of Castiel, reaching for the amulet and his bearskin cloak, its matted blood falling away to pristine newness, before donning them both.

Then the god turned to look at him.

The wolf cried out, backing away in utter horror. “Don’t hurt me, please!” He shouted. Dean had heard stories, tales of those who had been tricked by gods for their amusement then killed. Hell, many gods would kill you for just gazing upon them.

“Dean…” Castiel said, hurt by his words, reaching for his precious wolf. “Dean, please. Please don’t.”

At what must be an order, Dean halted in his tracks, averting his gaze from the god, and baring his neck to show his deference. His heart was pounding in his chest, his breath rapid.

“Dean,” Castiel pled, terror icing his heart.

This was it. This was everything he’d feared.

“Dean, please…” he said, reaching to touch his lover’s shoulder.

The wolf flinched, breath quickening in terror.

Heart aching within him, Castiel enveloped Dean in his arms, nuzzling his face in his chest.

The wolf fell back at the action, yelping in fear, body shaking as he kept his arms away, making himself utterly defenseless so as not to anger the celestial being - the living light of intent and power.

“No, please, Dean,” Castiel whimpered. “Please don’t be afraid. I’m sorry, I should have told you sooner, I’m - I’m so sorry,” he said, nuzzling into him closer. “I’m so sorry, Dean.”

It… it sounded like Castiel, like the Omega he’d met. But was the Omega he’d met even real? Even true?

Was everything they’d shared nothing more than a lie?

“Please don’t be afraid of me, Dean. Please,” Castiel begged, his wolf’s actions like knives in his heart. But Dean wouldn’t respond, wouldn’t look at him for fear of angering him. Finally, the Moon God licked his lips, shoulders drooping, knowing from experience what he had to say.

“You may speak freely.”

Dean let out a held breath, taking a moment to compose himself even as a god, as the moon itself touched him. A creature that could kill him with a mere thought.

“W-was this a test?” He finally asked. “Are you going to smite me? Eat me? Take me as your… your slave?”

Castiel fell into his lover’s chest.

_I’ve lost him. I’ve lost him forever._

“No, Dean. No, never. I’d never do anything like that. You know me. You met me all those times, we spoke. I’m still myself, Dean. I’m still your Castiel.”

“But I- I _touched_ you. I _filled_ you. That’s blasphemy. I should be put to death for such wicked heresy. Mortals and gods, they don’t… they don’t-”

“Fall in love?”

The wolf blinked back tears, bearing his throat even more for the god to slit any time it should wish to.

“What do you want from me?” Dean asked, voice cracking. “I thought you loved me. Why did you make me think you loved me?”

“Oh, Dean…” Castiel said, pulling away from the terrified wolf, heart breaking in his chest. At last, he just knelt submissively at the wolf’s feet, head lowered. “Forgive me for not telling you. I mean you no harm. Please don’t be afraid of me,” Castiel swallowed, before finally whispering, “Please don’t be afraid of me, Alpha.”

At that last word, Dean instinctively clenched his fists, finally daring to look the god in the eyes, anger and confusion burning in his broken heart. “Why are you doing this to me? What do you want from me?”

“I don’t want anything from you, Dean,” Castiel said, looking up at him with mournful eyes.

“Then why did you lie to me? Why did you do all this?"

Castiel took a long breath. "During Black Moons I oft venture to Aflheim as a wolf to smite what Fell I find. Every once in a while, though, I want to just... experience it."

"'Experience' it? Was getting me to... to fornicate with you such an experience?!"

"No, Dean. I thought myself too far from others to come across another person."

"Then why look like this," he said, gesturing at him, "like a handsome Omega?"

"I _am_ an Omega, Dean. And my beauty, I'm afraid I cannot help."

"Then why all the lies? Why didn't you just tell me, or run away if you didn't even want to grant me that courtesy? Why string me along for a year? Am I just some sort of plaything to you? Is that why you made me think you loved me?!” The wolf said, leaning forward to dare to meet Castiel face to face.

“Oh, Dean, I didn’t lie to you. I _do_ love you. I truly do.”

Dean was quiet for a moment, jaw set. "What do you want with me?" The wolf asked, heartbroken.

Castiel grew very quiet. "Nothing, Dean. I love you. I love you with all my heart."

“No,” Dean said, shaking his head. “That can’t be true.”

“But it is, Dean. I love you.”

“ _Why_?“ he asked, hurt by those awful words. The words that couldn’t be true. "Why would a _god_ love _me_?”

The brokenness in Dean’s voice hurt more than anything else the wolf had said. “You don’t believe you’re worthy of being loved?” He asked, head bowed.

“What? I…” Dean said, unsure of how to respond. “But I’m…” he drifted off, unable to continue.

Castiel shook his head. “How could I _not_ love you, Dean? After everything you did for me, a stranger? After all you’ve shown me, after all the care you’ve bestowed upon me, after your kindness, your gentleness to someone that gave you so little in return? To someone that hurt you so much?” Castiel said, taking a breath. “Please, please believe me, Dean. I love you. I’ve loved you from that first night. I wouldn’t lie about that. Oh, please, Dean, I’m so sorry. Forgive me. I love you. I still love you. I’m still me, I’m still Castiel. And I love you,” the Omega said, holding Dean once more, burying his face in his lover’s neck. “But I’m not worthy of you.”

The wolf seemed frozen at the action, unsure of what to do, what to feel, how to act. All he could understand right now was Moon God’s nearness. Castiel’s nearness. That, and the sweet, bright scent of his tousled hair. The same smell the wolf had fallen in love with almost a year ago.

Dean let out a soft whimper as he gingerly wrapped him in his arms, the tears finally falling unbidden. "How could you be anything like my Castiel?" He said, unconsciously holding him tighter. "How could a god be so sweet and loving? So gentle and soft? So eager to see the world?" He said, nuzzling into his hair. "How could that be you? How could that Castiel be the Moon God?" 

"Oh, Dean," he said, huddling closer. “That’s just _what_ I am. Not _who_ I am.”

“Who you are,” Dean repeated. “Who are you, Castiel?” he said, scenting the little Omega in his arms. Who was Castiel? The wolf tried to remember, tried to recall what his beloved Castiel was supposed to be like. What holding him was like, what that made him feel, how it made his heart ache. Could he feel that now? Could he ever again? "Who are you?" Dean whispered to himself, breathing in the scent of the wild Omega's hair. This was a god, a beam of celestial light, a creature of unimaginable power, yet it wanted to be held in his arms. To be told it was loved. Dean took in a deep, shaky breath. "Are you the curious little Omega I met? Wild and free and full of life, eager to see and try everything? Could that possibly be you?" He said, gripping him tighter. "Are you my Castiel?" He said, body melting and softening, curling around the familiar creature in his arms. "My Castiel, my Castiel,” he whispered into his love’s tousled hair. “Oh,” Dean said, love filling his heart. “My Castiel. My little Cas.”

“Yes, Alpha. I'm yours, your Castiel. Always,” The Omega replied, whimpering softly at his lover’s soft touches, at the warmth surrounding him, at the sound of his wolf’s calming heartbeat. “Dean?” He finally breathed.

“Hm?” Dean asked with a soft smile, not bothering to open his eyes.

“Dean, I can’t stay,” he said, pulling back to look his lover in the eyes. “I can never stay. I am bound to the cycle of the earth until the end of time. But, Dean, I- I should have known that such a pure, selfless, loving soul like yours would be Worthy.”

“Worthy?” Dean said, confused.

“It was your blood that healed us. Worthy blood.”

“I’m- I’m Worthy?”

“Oh, Dean, yes, of course you are! But, Dean, do you know what that means? That means that you are treasured by the spirits of earth and sky, that your blood is blessed, that you are honored by the gods, that you’re one of the few that may pass between the nine realms unharmed. Dean, my precious wolf, I can’t stay… but you can come with me.”

“Come with you?”

“To Asgard, where the Worthy may be gifted eternal life, if you so desire.”

“W- what?” The wolf said, utterly overwhelmed. “I- I…”

Castiel merely held him close, kissing his jaw lovingly. “It’s still me, Dean. I will always be myself. I will always be your Cas. Yet I am also the Moon; I love dancing through the sky as I have done since this world was born - but, more than that, I love _you_ , Speckled Wolf,” he said, kissing the precious spots dusting his throat, licking him gently to calm him. “But do you want me, Dean, as I am, free and wild? Would you want that? Want to live by my side? Want to live with me forever?”

“I…” Dean said, almost unable to absorb that was happening, but the scent of his beloved Omega couldn’t help but calm him, relax him. Couldn’t help but make him feel at home. And in that moment, he knew.

“…Yes,” he whispered, holding Castiel tightly. “Oh, yes, little one.”

Castiel took a deep breath of relief and pulled away, kneeling before his lover, baring his throat in submission. “Then will you take me as your mate, Dean? Even after deceiving you, after all I have done to you, can you forgive me? Will you be my Alpha?”

While still in some shock, seeing his Omega like this only filled his heart with love. At last, he leaned down to give his beloved a kiss.

Oh… he still tasted the same. His beloved would always taste the same. His little beloved.

“Cas,” he whispered, love flooding his soul.

“I love you, Dean. Please, Alpha. Please forgive me.”

Dean took a deep breath. “I forgive you, dear Omega,” he said, baring his teeth and biting down on his beloved’s throat.

Castiel let out a little surprised yelp at the pain of it, then a soft moan at the pleasure that coursed through him.

Tenderly, Dean licked up the little droplets of the Moon God’s blood, kissing the new mating mark he bore.

His mate. His dear mate. “Mine,” he said with a gentle kiss.

“Yours.”

________________________

Dean thrived in Asgard. He protected and cared for his beloved while his mate rested there between his nightly flights, often passing between worlds to bring the god wonders from each realm to taste. They cherished each other, having many adventures by each others’ side, and together bearing nine strong pups to their name. Even against the darkness and evil that threatened Castiel and his precious pups in their weakness, Dean forever defended them with his own cunning and and magic and skill, so that his soul burned gold with light and love.

Yet even the days spent with his lover were not enough for Castiel, who forever yearned for his mate while he was away. To remind himself of his love, Castiel painted the night sky with the same speckles that adorned his lover’s flesh, gifting them some of his radiance. From that day forward, every night he danced with them, tracing shapes and stories in their light.

In the many, many years that followed, the Golden Wolf became the patron of hunters and travelers, whose stars guided them even in the darkest nights. In time, some told stories of the Lightbringer, the Moon’s consort, telling tales of his bravery, his loyalty, and his love.

And some say that on nights when there is no moon in the sky, you might see a golden and a white wolf wandering the world, still hopelessly in love, playing in the snow, running through the fields, eating warm honey, laughing and living and shining even in the darkest of nights. At least, you _might_ see them.

Until Sunrise.

  
  



End file.
